Tips on not getting caught
- Thread starter johnpet
- Start date
SO = Significant Other ie wife or girlfriend
AMP = Asian Massage Parlor. KMP = Korean Massage Parlor. LMP= Latina Massage Parlor
Check this thread for more acronyms http://utopiaguide.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=106
AMP = Asian Massage Parlor. KMP = Korean Massage Parlor. LMP= Latina Massage Parlor
Check this thread for more acronyms http://utopiaguide.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=106
So I was mongering in a town that I had no real business being in and in my haste to get home I'm fairly certain I got caught by one of those freaking red-light cameras. I am not home to get the mail when it comes so I'll have to be ready with an excuse when that conversation materializes. I'm pretty sure I can come up with an excuse but these red-light cameras are a royal pain in the ass.
I think this has already been touched upon in a different thread but I just wanted to vent about those cameras.
I think this has already been touched upon in a different thread but I just wanted to vent about those cameras.
I once came home from an AMP ... wife was not home so I jumped in the shower. I had undressed in the bedroom. When I came back out I saw the used cover on the floor by my underwear!! THank god my wife was not home. I must have rolled over on the used cover and it stuck to me. Now I am extremely careful.
I think (not sure) that the mail will come from the Traffic Violations Bureau and since we are both registered owners of both cars then both of our names will be on the piece of mail. So she will have every right to open it.
Also, remember they can never prove who was driving the car at the time of the violation so it has to be sent to the registered owner(s).
Also, remember they can never prove who was driving the car at the time of the violation so it has to be sent to the registered owner(s).
Couple tips, as stated I use firefox for my normal browsing and chrome incognito mode for hobby and this board. Why as stated if wife checks my history and I have been on the internet all day and its erased RED FLAG. SO I have months of history on firefox and never delete. Always use incognito mode cause you will forget to erase history and she will see you log into an email she has never heard of TROUBLE
Set up a yahoo or gmail account you use ONLY for hobby, by memory remember the log in and password and make it something totally out of the ordinary. Use this account on incognito mode for all boards and providers. Best part about the email account you forget the password and log in make another. I even have my correct first name but a different last name why? My wife does a google search. I can always give my real name to a provider and explain why my yahoo account has a different name
Good luck
Set up a yahoo or gmail account you use ONLY for hobby, by memory remember the log in and password and make it something totally out of the ordinary. Use this account on incognito mode for all boards and providers. Best part about the email account you forget the password and log in make another. I even have my correct first name but a different last name why? My wife does a google search. I can always give my real name to a provider and explain why my yahoo account has a different name
Good luck
I have a good tip I haven't seen posted.
If you are using an Android phone, you can add an additional google account to it with contacts addresses, map stars (points of contact) even web links etc, pictures on Picasa web and even a google voice phone number. As several of you here has suggested, the least information available to be discovered the best so although all those items can be stored it might not be best to use them all.
If there are points in time when you can use the information, you can add the account to your phone or log in on Chrome incognito and retrieve the information. When you don't need it you simply remove the account and everything associated with it is also removed from your phone leaving no trace unless you called a number using the phone's main number. This in turn would result in a phone number called without the contact name once removed, with the contact name prior to removal.
Don't forget to keep the account off your device until you actually need information in it. The sync only takes a few moments for some items minutes for the rest.
If you are using an Android phone, you can add an additional google account to it with contacts addresses, map stars (points of contact) even web links etc, pictures on Picasa web and even a google voice phone number. As several of you here has suggested, the least information available to be discovered the best so although all those items can be stored it might not be best to use them all.
If there are points in time when you can use the information, you can add the account to your phone or log in on Chrome incognito and retrieve the information. When you don't need it you simply remove the account and everything associated with it is also removed from your phone leaving no trace unless you called a number using the phone's main number. This in turn would result in a phone number called without the contact name once removed, with the contact name prior to removal.
Don't forget to keep the account off your device until you actually need information in it. The sync only takes a few moments for some items minutes for the rest.
Chrome and Chome mobile incognito mode
Also, leaving ANY Chrome incognito window open, even minimized caches everything from the session including any logged in web pages, email accounts etc. even if you closed those particular windows. Try it to see how it works... open Chrome in incognito mode, log into a website or email account, open another window, then close the prior one. After that reopen a new window and go to that website or email account. You'll still be logged in. Be very careful with this.
Also Chrome is available on IOS and Android devices and also has incognito mode which you can go into and out of once opened by swiping left or right from inside the application.
Also, leaving ANY Chrome incognito window open, even minimized caches everything from the session including any logged in web pages, email accounts etc. even if you closed those particular windows. Try it to see how it works... open Chrome in incognito mode, log into a website or email account, open another window, then close the prior one. After that reopen a new window and go to that website or email account. You'll still be logged in. Be very careful with this.
Also Chrome is available on IOS and Android devices and also has incognito mode which you can go into and out of once opened by swiping left or right from inside the application.
Pre-planting mental seeds
You guys are relying too much on technology and not enough on pre-planting mental seeds.
1. I've always left obsolete cellphones laying around the home "as conversation pieces, they're hilarious!". It rings true because it is true; I had them before my SO and I were together. I often send a dinner guest home with one, making it clear they're a dime a dozen. At least three or four times in my presence, my SO has come across my current burner and she ignored it like the cluttering toy it seems (meanwhile, I break a cold sweat and curse my stupid absent-mindedness). In my car once, it was unexpectedly cold, and she just jumped out, popped the trunk, dug out a light jacket of mine, put it on and found a burner in the pocket. She just handed it to me, asking which idiot friend gave you that and doesn't he know your collection is big enough already?
2. I let my SO's calls go to vmail and I never phone her back in less than 15 minutes. Even then, I routinely DON'T phone her back but just text her that I "didn't hear the ring / didn't feel the vibrate" and what's up. I have no good reason for that, EXCEPT that some day I may be humping another chick when she calls and I don't want to have to explain why that one day I couldn't answer immediately.
3. Every 3 or 4 months, if it fits in the conversation, I mention that of course my back is getting stiffer with age, and of course I'm interested in getting a massage, but they're too expensive. If I ever get seen at or caught at an AMP, my back will have been extra painful that day, it will be my first time there and what bad luck my intentions were misunderstood.
4. Every couple of months I off-handedly mention that I leant my car to Joey/Frankie/whoever (which in actuality I never do). Sometimes I complain that they returned it smelling of cigarettes (in case my car ever does smell of cigarettes) and sometimes I complain that they returned it with a forgotten fastfood or grocery bag (which could later explain condoms or almost anything in the car). Sometimes I complain that they used half a tank of gas and where the hell did they drive to in the middle of a workday? So Joey or whoever is also the scapegoat for any red-light camera or for a mechanical breakdown. Example: That ungrateful Joey had my car all the way in City Island and the alternator went, and roadside assistance insisted that they won't cover the tow unless someone listed on the policy is with the vehicle, so I had to get a ride from coworker Frankie all the way to City Island!
You guys are relying too much on technology and not enough on pre-planting mental seeds.
1. I've always left obsolete cellphones laying around the home "as conversation pieces, they're hilarious!". It rings true because it is true; I had them before my SO and I were together. I often send a dinner guest home with one, making it clear they're a dime a dozen. At least three or four times in my presence, my SO has come across my current burner and she ignored it like the cluttering toy it seems (meanwhile, I break a cold sweat and curse my stupid absent-mindedness). In my car once, it was unexpectedly cold, and she just jumped out, popped the trunk, dug out a light jacket of mine, put it on and found a burner in the pocket. She just handed it to me, asking which idiot friend gave you that and doesn't he know your collection is big enough already?
2. I let my SO's calls go to vmail and I never phone her back in less than 15 minutes. Even then, I routinely DON'T phone her back but just text her that I "didn't hear the ring / didn't feel the vibrate" and what's up. I have no good reason for that, EXCEPT that some day I may be humping another chick when she calls and I don't want to have to explain why that one day I couldn't answer immediately.
3. Every 3 or 4 months, if it fits in the conversation, I mention that of course my back is getting stiffer with age, and of course I'm interested in getting a massage, but they're too expensive. If I ever get seen at or caught at an AMP, my back will have been extra painful that day, it will be my first time there and what bad luck my intentions were misunderstood.
4. Every couple of months I off-handedly mention that I leant my car to Joey/Frankie/whoever (which in actuality I never do). Sometimes I complain that they returned it smelling of cigarettes (in case my car ever does smell of cigarettes) and sometimes I complain that they returned it with a forgotten fastfood or grocery bag (which could later explain condoms or almost anything in the car). Sometimes I complain that they used half a tank of gas and where the hell did they drive to in the middle of a workday? So Joey or whoever is also the scapegoat for any red-light camera or for a mechanical breakdown. Example: That ungrateful Joey had my car all the way in City Island and the alternator went, and roadside assistance insisted that they won't cover the tow unless someone listed on the policy is with the vehicle, so I had to get a ride from coworker Frankie all the way to City Island!
Very good Al. I always tell my wife that there is no signal in many of the places I go for work and that is why I didn't respond so quickly.
I always monger during business hours and I don't answer the cell when I am with my wife unless it is someone I know .. besides I mostly do amp scene and they aren't going to be calling me.
I have a change of clothes in my car that I tell my wife that if I go somewhere after work and need different pants or shirt .... I have them. All these things have worked ... and my wife has no clue.
My back isn't the best either and that is always in teh back of my mind should I ever get caught ... and she knows all about my back and has actually told me to get massages!!
I always monger during business hours and I don't answer the cell when I am with my wife unless it is someone I know .. besides I mostly do amp scene and they aren't going to be calling me.
I have a change of clothes in my car that I tell my wife that if I go somewhere after work and need different pants or shirt .... I have them. All these things have worked ... and my wife has no clue.
My back isn't the best either and that is always in teh back of my mind should I ever get caught ... and she knows all about my back and has actually told me to get massages!!
OH ... One good one is if you are with strippers that stink of perfume ... if you wear your strip club outfit you keep in your trunk ... when you get out of the club you change back into your regular clothes .. but you still are going to have perfume on you. You can't get inot bed with your wife like that ... I come home ... and I know she may be awake and as I get undressed I say ... "Wow .. I stink" then go in the shower.
Why do I stink? You can say ... I ate at a steakhouse and now I stink from the place (that happens). OR ... you can say that you were in a hot place and you sweated a lot. Sometimes I will say nothing and get in the shower ... and if asked I say ... My ass was really raw from a bad case of the runs and I needed to clean it out. She usually says that this was too much information. I would rather her think I am a stinky disgusting mess than a guy who is seeing amps or strippers.
Why do I stink? You can say ... I ate at a steakhouse and now I stink from the place (that happens). OR ... you can say that you were in a hot place and you sweated a lot. Sometimes I will say nothing and get in the shower ... and if asked I say ... My ass was really raw from a bad case of the runs and I needed to clean it out. She usually says that this was too much information. I would rather her think I am a stinky disgusting mess than a guy who is seeing amps or strippers.
One of my regular excuses is that I am at a poker game. She knows I play poker a lot. I don't answer my phone while I am playing, and if your finances are mingled at all, it explains why you either have a lot of cash on you, or why you "lost" a couple hundred.
In my case, it has the added benefit of being true most of the time.
In my case, it has the added benefit of being true most of the time.
If you're worried about the stuff websites leave on browsers, (and they all do) try downloading and using a free utility - crapcleaner (ccleaner) and then d/l CCEnhancer v3.7. It will update ccleaner to flush out lots of temp files that your tech savvy wife (or kids) might stumble across. Side benefit is you may even get better results from your pc as you clean it up.
Be careful with ccleaner updated with ccenhancer and heed all the warnings. Some items will delete your t-bird passwords or knock off your desktop background etc.
If you're tech savvy yourself, check out BleachBit, but be super careful as its very thorough.
Be careful with ccleaner updated with ccenhancer and heed all the warnings. Some items will delete your t-bird passwords or knock off your desktop background etc.
If you're tech savvy yourself, check out BleachBit, but be super careful as its very thorough.