Ambiguity illustrated
I wanted to post a link to a thread I read a few years ago on some other hobby PMB, but I have had no luck finding it. Too far back and my memory too inexact (not even sure where I saw it...probably TBD or ***), so here is my best recollection of it:
He was the regular customer of a provider who came to his place (I guess he was single) for a session fairly frequently. She was not a clockwatcher and frequently hung around afterwards to chat for a while, maybe have a drink or whatever. Then, one day she shows up for a scheduled afternoon tryst, collects her envelope and does the deed(s) as usual. But the chat afterwards goes on and on with both of them deeply engaged in the whatever they were discussing (which I don't remember if he even said). It gets to be dinner time, and he offers to make her something to eat. She accepts. More talk over dinner. Somehow a movie they both loved comes up. He has it on video and suggests watching it after dinner. She agrees. By the time dinner and the movie are done it is well into the evening. She starts to get her things together to leave but, in his perception at least, seems to be sort of stalling and lingering awkwardly. In retrospect it seems (to me) that she may have been hoping to be invited to stay longer, maybe for a second bedroom round or maybe for the night or who knows..., but he thinks she might be waiting for some extra payment for all of the extra hours of her time. He, in his account of it, tentatively offers her some extra $$$ for staying so long. Land mine! She is totally insulted and tells him off big time, says he is an insensitive asshole who thinks that a woman who sells her body has no self-respect and stuff like that, storms out and refuses to see him again. He is, naturally, very surprised and upset and so posts to ask for people's comments. A long thread insues that you can easily imagine about who was right wrong, misled and so forth. I don't recall, and probably never heard, whether the two of them ever sorted it out and "made up".
This story well illustrates what I mean by the ambiguity that can develop in these sorts of developing provider-client relationships. Nothing so dramatic has ever happened to me, but I have definitely more than once found myself in somewhat similar situations, wondering whether she might be offended by an offer of additional payment or feel "taken" if none were forthcoming. Both can be very real possibilities.
-Ww