You know you're screwed if...

[Mr. Wiggley]

You lend a provider money.

 

[backseat]

when your pants are around your ankles, and she pulls out a nun-chuck, and demands all your cash.......

 

[LISteve]

She says "I don't do that."

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

She utters those four deadly words..." is it in yet?"

 

[genius]

She utters those four deadly words..." is it in yet?"

And 5 seconds later "are you done yet?"

 

[lovelight]

You wait more than 15 minutes in the parking lot.....

 

[trigger]

they lead you to the first room instead of yh

lead you to the first room and not the back room.

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

You think you develop a relationship/ feelings with or for a provider instead of remembering you're an ATM.

 

[lovelight]

20 minutes in the lot and she texts you " just getting ready hun...."

 

[Mr. Joyboy]

The picture in BP looks like Rihanna and when she opens the door it's Rosie O'Donnell

 

[lovelight]

Your phone buzzes in the middle of the night and it's the blonde bombshell

 

[backseat]

Your phone buzzes in the middle of the night and it's the blonde bombshell

I hope your not laying next to your SO

 

[lovelight]

Actually Blonde Bombshell hasn't done that in a while but there was a time when she would text me everyday. Now she's very elusive and I haven't seen her in 2 months. Don't really care at this point she's got LOTS of personal issues and some LE activity in her life.

 

[genius]

You're not smart enough or too cheap to buy a $15 burner cell and $20/3mo for minutes and keep the phone turned off except for those few times you need to set up an appointment.

I keep mine in my car - it looks like one of the very old phones I had years ago (that's what I say it is should anyone ask) and it is there for 911 calls in case my smartphone is lost, gets stolen or misplaced or otherwise is not available. Old phones off contract or out of minutes can still call 911.

 

[genius]

You get a call from a detective asking to interview you as to why an escort's phone who turned up dead had calls to and from your #.

A non-issue if you were smart enough or not too cheap to buy, using cash, a $15 burner cell and $20/3mo for minutes.

 

[Slinky Bender]

You are in some Dominican after hours in Corona and a guy has a gun in your mouth and is screaming at you for stealing $10,000 dollars from him because he is so high that he actually thinks you are the guy who ripped him off while a bunch of other drunk Dominicans are screaming "It's not him" but he is so fucked up that he is not hearing it.

 

[backseat]

You are in some Dominican after hours in Corona and a guy has a gun in your mouth and is screaming at you for stealing $10,000 dollars from him because he is so high that he actually thinks you are the guy who ripped him off while a bunch of other drunk Dominicans are screaming "It's not him" but he is so fucked up that he is not hearing it.

I guess it was the last visit to that joint. I hope that wasn't you slinky. I know of a similar story, Vietnam

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

Did he pull the trigger?

 

[Slinky Bender]

I'm still here, aren't I?

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

Lol ok I guess it was in fact you then.
Happy for that.

You're screwed if a girls getting ready to give you a blowjob and she spots her boyfriend peeking in the living room window.