I appreciate everyone weighing in on this and offering some advice. My head is actually in a very good place. I have been thinking that maybe Banacek is right in that it might be best to let sleeping dogs lie. In hindsight Brandy and I were very good friends, not lovers as we both had thought at one time or another. She shared a lot of things with me over the years and I was there to help her emotionally when she needed it most. I will keep her secrets to myself and not share them with others after all I really don't want to hurt her.
I will share my last experience with Brandy. She and I have been expressing our feelings for one another over several months. Before scheduling a date I had shared with her that the feeling we have for one another I have certain expectations. I didn't want to be with Brandy but I wanted to be with ...... She wanted this too and we spoke about what both of us wanted to experience during our date. Driving over to see her we were both a little nervous me more than her and we were anxious for this date. When I knocked on her door, she opened it standing behind it. I was disappointed at first because well this is what she does for everyone. Well I guess she wanted to surprise me with what she was wearing. She never disappoints as she always dresses impeccably and some of her outfits were for my eyes only. This particular day she wore something that I was the first one seeing her in and she looked amazing. (ie: On another day, when I was hurt she wore a sexy nurses uniform for me, that she said was for my eyes only and she would never wear for anyone but me. She did these things for me which is always a nice touch.) We hugged one another, kissing and talking frequently while also caressing each other. We always talked a lot which we both enjoyed. Mentally things were moving in the way we both wanted and planned. Then she unfortunately resorted to Brandy and started to do her grinding dance, which I didn't want because quite honestly it was fake shit and this is what she does with all her boyfriends. I tried switching things up but many of her movements was that of Brandy and not herself as we both talked about. The entire date was not going the way we wanted, the way we spoke about. I was so disinterested that I faked a leg cramp just to end things. She wanted to help me finish but she was acting as Brandy and not herself. I was not interested. We were quiet towards one another as we got dressed. She was at least concerned about my leg. I walked her out to her car and we both drove off.
A few days had passed before we spoke about this encounter. The conversation needless to say didn't go very well. I basically told her that she wasn't herself like she said she wanted to be but rather continued to be Brandy by putting out a performance that really sucked. In the subsequent weeks that followed ,on more than one occasion I told her that I will never see Brandy again. I told her if she can't be herself in the bedroom, then I wanted nothing to do with her sexually again. Unfortunately for us our friendship slowly but surely deteriorated. She had asked me to come by and visit her but I told her that I have no need to see her. She took that to mean that I have no interest to see her other than to fuck her which only made her more hostile towards me. I told her that we can talk over the phone or text one another. I don't have to physically see her, besides I have no interest in fucking Brandy. We just continue throwing digs at one another which doesn't bode well in having any meaningful relationship.
Hey Mr. Wiggley, I am no shill. The reason I still pump her up is because honestly she is a very good provider. She is not for me and maybe we are not right for each other. Depending on what guys are searching for whether they are looking for GFE experience, great legs, no enhancements, always dresses to the nines, very nice body and bbbj to boot, she might be for you. If these things are of interest, she might be able to satisfy you.
For now, I am happy not seeing Brandy and in all honesty I will not see her again. If she wants to be herself, then just maybe we can see one another again. For now, I think Brandy is okay with this outcome as for..... she is still trying to wrap her head around these changes.