see, here's the thing. i'm telling you that i was hurt by my husband's actions - not the credit card, and not the failure to conceal evidence. and since i'm the one who felt hurt, i think it is a little silly for anyone to come behind me to tell me i am wrong about what i felt hurt by!
is no one else here going to answer my question? maybe nobody wants to talk about being on the receiving end of this stuff.
is no one else here going to answer my question? maybe nobody wants to talk about being on the receiving end of this stuff.
It's easy to assign blame, it's hard to objectively evaluate feelings and assign blame where it truly belongs. And in some instances, I think feelings are over-evaluated to justify underlying feelings or beliefs. It's extremely hard (if not impossible) to be 100% honest to others, but for many it's just as hard to be 100% honest with ourselves. Those of us who can (not implying myself) often only do so fleetingly, and then fall back into our pretenses to get by on a day to day basis.
I can say that on several occasions where I was "caught" by my wife for misbehavior (credit card and other things), she made my excuses to protect herself in her cocoon and I broke that cocoon with the truth. She rebuilt her cocoon and we moved on, but that is where she chooses to live so that's that. If that is how she chooses to allow me my "side dishes" I will take it.