Phantom's notion of seeing one provider for a longer time is one I support completely. An extended session with someone you know gives you both time to talk and to have sex. On several occasions in Manhattan, I have booked time with a travelling provider, (whom I had seen before, either here or in her home city) which included drinks, dinner, a jazz club or sports event, and then a return to her hotel. I became extremely comfortable with those few individuals over time because we knew each other outside the sheets. Yet, our distance apart (geographically) always kept the relationship fresh.
JC: Since I am not married, or involved, I do not know how to pull off this type of tryst. But I suspect, if your business ever involves travel, that you could creatively construct some scenario that would work. I have a colleague, married with 3 kids, who constantly creates make-believe "out of town" trips, while he is actually in a mid-town hotel with some of the best Independents in the city. There always seems to be a methodology that avoids the normal radar.