Dont look too hard, some may not like what they see

#1
All the years I was running around, chasing, trying to score the ultimate fun session.
Sex with a hot looking girl, for as little money as possible, and expecting over the top girlfriend style lovemaking.
I found it many time. Unfortunately, it also found me, more time than not, found me invovled with woman half my age, but with 5 times the amount of problems.
Ive always wanted to view some of my favorite providers as the happy go lucky type of single college student, the hot one, that prances down the main strip in Jacksonville during spring break. One of those, Ill keep it in my head, shes the type I so want and desire.
No worries, no cares, living off daddys money, going to school, hopping on a plane to florida for a weed over spring break, and looking to fuck some older guys for quick cash so they can party on,

Why dont I find these women.Why doesn it see the other guy takes them back to his room
Maybe Im just too old for this.

Tomorrow, Ill post the real girls, the lives, what I see when we leave the hotel rooms, leave the comany of the agents, the man handlers. Lets take a look at how they live.
 
#2
Very good post, Jerry.


They come from all different walks of life, Jerry. But what they all have in common is that they need to make money to live. Just like the rest of us.
 
#3
Im not setting any of this on a stone tablet.(this isnt anyones typical life) It may not be the life of a girl you know, or even similar to the life you're almost certain your best provider lives.
I try my best never to judge anyone I meet. I will not comment on the lifestyle the providers I mention lead. I'm just offering a glimpse at how the women I've met in this industry live, again, not all of them, but a few that I've had extended relationships with.
Extended not meaning romantic, only referring to the amount of time I've continued seeing them and getting to know them much better.
One woman that pops right up into my mind, no names, 25 y/o white female, decent looking, beautiful body,lovely hair, an overall clean looking middle class next door type one would typically find in any neighborhood.
We all have our own idea of beauty, and in this hobby, we all pick and chose women based on various factors, looks, service, and price usually the top three.
Me, I also look for convenience and reliability, before I decide to see her continously.
So this young woman, came out of the military a couple of years before, found herself without a job. Had various jobs, all low paying, nothing to support her auto payments and her rent, her 2 largest bills to crack each month, besides living expenses and food.
She moved in with a bf, to help share expenses, the road was rocky, or so she said all the time, complained alot, but couldnt afford to dump him.
At one point, she decided to try dancing in a club, how she was introduced, I am not sure, but I believe she mentioned once her friend danced at a local club and told her about tips, and that she could clear close to 200 a night. So she started dancing a few nights a week. A little later on, she was approached by someone in the club, and someone told her if she escorted, she'd make thousands a week without having to dance all night long.
She hooked up with a madam, more of a broker, and decided to give it a shot.
When I met her, it was her 2nd or 3rd client. I was given her cell number and the broker said I can call her anytime I want, she will work it out with the escort. sounded good to me.
This escort is not typical of the type I've met over the years.
She told me after a few sessions, she was attending college, getting a degree, in a profession, and is only escorting until her tuition and bills are all paid in full.
She held true to her word. She left the bf, moved in with family for a year, escorted rarely, but had steady clients like myself, and maybe 3-5 others. She was an A+ provider in my book, which means my time with her was always excellent, details arent important, because I'm quite sure she offered different services to each of her selected clients. I asked for something, she either refused or agreed.
I was in heaven, 26 y/o decent looking college student.
And then it happenned, she called me up one day, and informed me she was ending her escorting career, having to put more time into school, and she reached her goal with money.
So rare, at least I've found that a woman actually used this hobby as a tool to get to such a great goal.I know many do, but there's often so many other problems that trip them up during their ****ney.
I've never heard from her again, she shut all her phones, ***** accounts, and went back to private life all within maybe 2 years after she began escorting, even less.
 
#4
I asked for something, she either refused or agreed.
ss.
meaning, there were no negotiations, either it was something she was comfortable with, or she would say no, I dont do that.(money played no role in her decision, she would not ask me for more money for different options on the menu. If it wasn't something she enjoyed, or didn't feel comfortable with, it wasn't available, at any price)
 
#5
She was the type I've searched for for many years before and after I met her.
I never found another like her, close, but not a typical college student without many hangups, or mental disorders.

Next, I'd like to talk about a lovely agency escort I met once.
She worked for a very well known agency, and I was a good client of that agency for most of it's active time. First time I met this 23 y/o, I knew I'd enjoy her company.
She was typical of most agency escorts, she would negotiate pricing if you asked for anything special. She had a larger menu than most restaurants. Ofcourse, it was not pleasant at first, but you learn how to deal with agency escorts and understand a big portion of their cut goes to the house, so they try to squeeze as much out of each client as they can, without offending them.
She was hispanic, very petit, not a beauty, but at 23, with good skin, she was a winner as far as escorting went. Her services were way above and beyond the call of duty.
She held nothing back, and the first time I met her for a 2 hour session, I stopped her giving me the menu, and said to her, Ill give you 100 dollars extra, I just want it all. She was thrilled,(the fee was 350 for 2 hours back then)and I got more than I could handle. I fell in love with her service and I called the agency 3 days later, she was gone.
A week later, seemed whatever differences she had with the agency were resovled, because the agency owner mentioned she was back, after I booked a different escort, so I said, oh, great, next time. 3 days later, she was gone again, but kept my number when she called me from the driver the first time we met. I was suprised, but she told me she was no longer working for the agency, would I care to see her on the side.
I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, because I would never cut an agency out and cheat them, but the fact was she was no longer with the agency. I called them to confirm it, and that should have been enough to let me know something was wrong.
But, the sex was off the wall insane, to me at least, so I carried on with her.
As our relationship continued, I noticed things, meaning she was off a bit.
The sex was calming down, and she always seemed tired.
I questioned her about doing drugs, she denied drug use, but I knew something was up.
I took her home, to a decent place in an apartment building, where she lived with her bf, who knew she was seeing me.(Ok, I don't judge them, some men don't care as long as the rents paid)
I didn't meet him ,but he was waiting for her one night, and I caught a glimpse, and I knew what the problem was. Junkie. She was living with a junkie, I was quite sure she was using something, smoking something, but it was never that evident.
Sure enough, she became homeless, and called me right away asking if I could lend her a few thousand to secure an apt and security of 2 months, I refused, but told her I'd see her.
She arrived 2 hours late, she was dirty, smelled, she was living in the street for over 2 weeks, homeless, she was so high I was suprised she found the room.
It was over that minute, I could not afford to care for a girl who threw her life away, and duped me all along. I let her shower, gave her a few hundred to get a room, and that's the last I ever saw her. Cruel? Maybe, but a homeless junkie is something I didn't need in my life at that point.
 
#6
Another young escort I met, actually was only 20 when I met her.
She brought me into her home right away, had one child at the time, and a roomate, female roomate.
I knew of her financial difficulties, but I started to learn about her life as I kept going back for more visits.(it lasted a long time)
After her second child, 2 different men fathered each child, neither stayed with her past the pregnancy, she asked me if I wanted to be like a regular bf. I said you want a sugar daddy, laughing ofcourse, and she said yes.
So a long relationship began, and like all relationships, we had our rough patches.(this is supposed to be fun, somewhere in a long term whore/john relationship, it turns so real, its like a real life gig, and theres problems with that)
I watched as she was beat by her bfs, watched as ACS took away her children on more than one occasion, ran there on weekends to make sure there was food in the fridge for the kids so the next time ACS came over, they wouldn't suggest to the judge anything negative.
This woman spent an awful lot of time in court, between protection orders from violent bfs, ex husbands, and her problems with ACS, (she was a known physciatric patient with documented illness, which ACS watched closely, making sure she was a fit mother)
Me, I thought she always took care of her children first, they were always so happy, playful, were eating all the time, and I even took them out to eat many, many times.
I didn't see the things ACS or others must have seen, maybe I was blind, like I think so many of us johns are, living in our middle class or upper middle class lives.
Not seeing all this misery some of these escorts have in their lives.
So I never realized how severe her problems were until she started to take alot of her frustrations out on me.
 
#7
and thats the way our relationship went on for years.
She would meet a man, he would move in, she would find some excuse to scream and yell at me, how I'm nothing to her, and then 3 months later, after the fun and games wer eover, and the new bf was living off her SSI disability check, she would contact me, and ask me if I wanted to start seeing her again.(I took advantage of times like this, because I came through for her, and she kept her level of service up for me, and afterall, that's why we all see escorts, for our own personal and selfish reasons)
There were days she'd call me up crying, I'd have to drop everything, make excuses, and run to her to find her bleeding from a beating her bf just gave her, and when I told her to report it, she would yell at me to mind my own business, so I questioned her as to why she called me then. (she always needed money, money, money, money, )
Ofcourse, I knew she had a slight substance abuse problem, besides her prescription drugs, she liked to smoke alot. But she kept herself clean, her children clean, her home spotless, and it was a pretty nice home, no matter where she moved.
But her life went on like this. Bf, fight, new BF fight, and all along I would be there getting my share of her body for the right price.
At one point she married one of them, a city hall type of wedding, spur of the moment type of deal(I always knew she wasn't playing with a full deck) and called me on her wedding night crying what a mistake she made. On her wedding night.
I used to question myself why I continue on with women like this, but this is the typical type of woman I meet in this hobby. Most were led to escort by severe financial needs.
And making this choice was just another bad choice(or maybe good choice depending on how you view it) along with alot of other choices they made in life.
It was not my position to contact authorities, I offered her help to leave her abusive bfs, but she seemed to seek this type out. I was only a john, when she met someone new, she let me know all too often, so I kept my distance.
As her life got deeper and deeper into things I just didn't care to deal with anymore(court, court, and police always visiting when she fought with her bf, things a john really doesn't need in his life)I decided to severe the strings, but I do keep in touch with her on occasion, but no more physical contact.
I've offered her financial help, nothing huge, but she hasn't taken me up on it.(I'm glad, but I do have a soft spot for her, and just wish she would straighten out her life a bit, but don't get me wrong, I'm no saviour. I'm a john)
 
#8
No romancing it. If you want the hard, biting edge of it?

I found it many time. Unfortunately, it also found me, more time than not, found me invovled with woman half my age, but with 5 times the amount of problems.
Sex is direct access to the physical self. Since it is very difficult for most to disconnect the corporal with the psyche it usually also means direct contact with the ego.

Why would it then be surprising to find that any individual who has involved themselves in selling off, in small pieces, access to their their body and mind is in any way troubled? We can argue about to what extent, but the fact that it is the case is unremarkable.

Same can be said for those who go looking about to purchase access to other people's bodies and minds. The damage may not always be as visible to the naked eye, but it is there none-the-less.

Ive always wanted to view some of my favorite providers as the happy go lucky type of single college student, the hot one, that prances down the main strip in Jacksonville during spring break. One of those, Ill keep it in my head, shes the type I so want and desire.

No worries, no cares, living off daddys money, going to school, hopping on a plane to florida for a weed over spring break, and looking to fuck some older guys for quick cash so they can party on,
Anyone who is incapable of walking about with shut eyes and ears will, shortly, have a very good idea of the landscape they have chosen to ****ney about in. If you carry with you a pair of rose tinted specs and some ear plugs you can blot out just about anything on the conscious level. That doesn't mean its not seeping though via the sub-conscious and biting you on the fanny just the same.

Why dont I find these women.Why doesn it see the other guy takes them back to his room Maybe Im just too old for this.
Because they aren't going back to some other guys room anymore than they are going to yours, mine, or anyone else's. And its not a matter of being too old, for the johns anyway. In fact, it is frequently being older [or the fear of it] that brings some men into this. "If I can still have sex with young women, even though I have to pay for it, I'm not quite dead yet.", is in the back of the mind of more than a few middle-aged and older clients.

Tomorrow, Ill post the real girls, the lives, what I see when we leave the hotel rooms, leave the comany of the agents, the man handlers. Lets take a look at how they live.
They live any number of ways. Though there are certain archetypes. They are a very small handful of young women who are looking for pin money to get pretty things. This is especially true of young women today who believe blowing guys is the new "third base". Still, it is only a few. The majority of women, whether they come to this from lower financial bases or middle-class ones, do so out of some form of desperation.

I've seen this business from a multitude of sides, including a few not privy to the average john. My stories are my own because telling them, beside stripping me the kind of naked I might not necessarily want to be in public, document a certain type of hypocrisy. The kind where you know precisely what you are doing, know its not particularly good for you or those you are doing it with, but you do it anyway. You see I don't own a pair of rosy tinted specs, or any ear plugs for that matter.

And here is the ugly of it... Stop reading at this point those of you who don't want those specs and ear plugs ripped right off you.

Its a little like hanging out in an opium den, sharing the occasional drag from the hookah pipes of those around you. Pretending its all fun and games but knowing you just don't see many of these people living long and fruitful lives. Coming to the understanding that, unless you are very, very, careful and very lucky, that probably applies to yourself as well. You see, if you chase the dragon you usually burn to death. At the very least you are mauled by its claws and singed by the heat of its breath.

While speaking in terms of absolutes always gets one in trouble, the vast majority of providers and clients exist in a world of co-dependency. Each has something the other wants. We are each others pushers and each others users simultaneously. Each supplying, directly or indirectly, the other's drug of choice and not so much filling the voids in each other as tripping into them.
 
#9
should I have continued with a women with such problems, at this point what does it matter.
I had a run with women and all of them seemed to have underlying physciatric problems,depression, bipolar, etc......and all of them had substance abuse problems, and most have bfs that I would consider abusive, but then who am I, to judge if a man is not good to his woman. It's the life alot of these young type of women I frequent seem to live.
I guess my luck is not as good as others.
 
#10
. The kind where you know precisely what you are doing, know its not particularly good for you or those you are doing it with, but you do it anyway. You see I don't own a pair of rosy tinted specs, or any ear plugs for that matter.



anyone who wears blinders should not be participating. Most of us know and understand to some extent, who we are dealing with, and that it might not be the smartest moves both parties could make, but it's about self satisfaction and money. 2 powerful forces that move people.
 
#11
While speaking in terms of absolutes always gets one in trouble, the vast majority of providers and clients exist in a world of co-dependency. Each has something the other wants. We are each others pushers and each others users simultaneously. Each supplying, directly or indirectly, the other's drug of choice and not so much filling the voids in each other as tripping into them.
Great post,Thorn.This last paragraph can't be overemphasized.
 
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#13
anyone who wears blinders should not be participating. Most of us know and understand to some extent, who we are dealing with, and that it might not be the smartest moves both parties could make, but it's about self satisfaction and money. 2 powerful forces that move people.
I'd argue that it is, for many on both sides of the equation, as much about self-medication as self-satisfaction.

The problem with self-medication is that it almost as often as not runs away from the person doing it. They don't intend it to be the cause of a new problem. Quite the contrary they hope it to be the cure, or at least temporary easement, of another problem.

As I suggested, that isn't how it works out most of the time though, is it?
 
#15
I'd argue that it is, for many on both sides of the equation, as much about self-medication as self-satisfaction.

The problem with self-medication is that it almost as often as not runs away from the person doing it. They don't intend it to be the cause of a new problem. Quite the contrary they hope it to be the cure, or at least temporary easement, of another problem.

As I suggested, that isn't how it works out most of the time though, is it?


Its like a marriage. Starts off all hot and heavy with the sex, theres so much happiness, then as the reality of life sinks in, the bills, the every day daily routine, over and over again, people seek out new ways to be happy again, to find some excitement. Divorce is a typical way, but for me personally, , I only want the sex part with a young woman. I want it to continue yearly, and thats a very selfish attitude, but I think most men or women that frequent other sex partners besides their spouses, are just selfish people, regardless of how they claim to be in sexless marriages. Noone guaranteed a life of great sex when they decided to be with that one person.
Its all about the kindling of new excitement, finding new ways to feel good again, and if sex makes a person feel good, well, self medication, I guess, but simply just some happiness.(but agree with your post all the way)
 
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#16
and so the women continue to enter and exit my life.(mostly escorts)
One I remember so well, a real looker. Perhaps not model type, but a 19y/o adorable hispanic female with a big rear end and a set of boobs to match.
I don't recall having so much fun with an agency escort since the days of that petit hispanic junkie I met years and years earlier.
The difference was this one was a clean, non drug abuser.
When she left the agency, as so many of the young ones do, I was lucky enough to have someone put me in contact with her.
It was quite a ride for me, a young vibrant 19y/0 female, really into anything, sexually, I thought I'd be with this one forever, or at least till she had enough.
Well, as usual, I thought wrong.
She didnt live in the same state as me.
She began her career in the sex industry, as a cage dancer in a strip club.
She didnt do lap dances, only danced in a cage as more of a live picture, than anything else.
She held 2 other jobs as well, working in a non descript job in an insurance firm, and working one night a week as a hostess in a food establishment.
With 3 jobs, she couldnt meet her financial obligations each month, especially since she strapped herself down with a brand new car.
She decided, since she was a very family oriented woman, to escort in another state where there was never a chance of her being spotted or noticed.
It worked out ok for a while.
 
#17
Its like a marriage. Starts off all hot and heavy with the sex, theres so much happiness, then as the reality of life sinks in, the bills, the every day daily routine, over and over again, people seek out new ways to be happy again, to find some excitement. Divorce is a typical way, but for me personally, , I only want the sex part with a young woman. I want it to continue yearly, and thats a very selfish attitude, but I think most men or women that frequent other sex partners besides their spouses, are just selfish people, regardless of how they claim to be in sexless marriages. Noone guaranteed a life of great sex when they decided to be with that one person.
Its all about the kindling of new excitement, finding new ways to feel good again, and if sex makes a person feel good, well, self medication, I guess, but simply just some happiness.(but agree with your post all the way)
You seem to be discussing this from the client side alone.

Addressing it from that perspective, at its least damaging it is a form of escapism.

I hope that is my situation, though I could be too close to it to know for certain.

In that form it is selfish in that it is hidden from those who have a right to know about it. If I were single and unattached I wouldn't consider it selfish at all. Perhaps a sign of a stunted life, but not a selfish one.

Society does share part of the blame here. I am sure that at some point, where life was so primitive that survival was the paramount thought consuming every one's mind, very little mental effort was spent on who was fucking who outside of romantic commitments. The dominant male was spreading his seed among as many females as would have him, and that would be the majority of the females in the group.

Its not that we didn't have frontal lobes by that point. It was simply common sense dictated survival of the species and the most robust men mating with the most robust women was the best way to guarantee that.

The thing is that we aren't so far away from that time, in evolutionary terms, that the hard wiring isn't still in place. Society still, under the surface, considers a male who is past the time when he is rutting and able to attract the most robust females from the group no longer truly viable. We see this in the work place. We feel it in social settings.

Let's face it, at least in Western cultures respect for aging individuals as providers of balance and wisdom through experience is non-existent. Everyone worships at the alter of youth. That has a big part to play in why some men chase young pussy well past the time that common sense should indicate they sit down and give it a rest.

I choose to presume this is the reason I chase the dragon. I figure if I can keep it up [both literally and figuratively] I am, no matter how, still viable. It doesn't matter that they no longer choose me because I am strong or young. If they choose me because I can provide for them monetarily, even for short time, it still counts. Or so I tell myself. Still I know better. Like I said, no rose tinted specs here.

So, I provide them with money and turn a knowing eye to what they might be doing with it and they provide me with escape from boredom and tediousness while also allowing me, for an instant, to pretend I am still the young bull.

Like I said, I presume this to be the least damaging of many scenarios.

Those who use this to hide diseased marriages from themselves [BTDT], hide from things much more serious then boredom and fear of growing old, etc, are in much worse straights. If only because, like in most who self-medicate, all they succeed in doing is covering over the symptoms and not dealing with the actual root of the issue. So they simply get sicker from what already ailed them and, in many cases, add a whole new set of problems with which they must now deal.

The worst part of self-medication is it prohibits resolution of an illness. Even if it allows an individual to remain fairly high functioning, it is never a cure.
 
#18
OK, do with this thread what you will but...

One I remember so well, a real looker. Perhaps not model type, but a 19y/o adorable hispanic female with a big rear end and a set of boobs to match.
I don't recall having so much fun with an agency escort since the days of that petit hispanic junkie I met years and years earlier.
While I have more empathy than you might imagine let be get this off my chest.

I've been lucky enough to not have suffered anything that society sees as an "addiction" without looking real close. In other words, I hide it REALLY well. I do come from a long line of family members where that hasn't been the case and know, well past certain, that I have an addictive personality disorder myself. In my case it takes the forms of food and sex. Often related. I manage both, or at least until lately, and remain high functioning and out of harms way. [the sex part I have a grip on, its the food that has been getting out of hand of late... though I am working on it... I just haven't gotten mad enough yet... anger being my primary motivator toward accomplishment... you want to see me get something done, tell me I can't do it.]

I state this because I am well aware of a sort of thing that happens in rehabs, even though I have never been to one myself other then to visit said family members. The addicts, at some point, all begin to hang around and tell stories. They tell themselves its to delve into dark corners and learn more about their addiction, but what happens is it becomes these great yarns about all the things that were so hypnotic and knarly about their drug of choose and the talk itself becomes something of one big contact high [one of the reasons I think PMB's are so big among the client side to begin with... it becomes an extension of the high they are getting from the sex... a way to expand upon it].

This thread is taking on that feel even though [and may I remind you] that its title is: "Don't Look to Hard. You May Not Like What You See."

If you want to get real I am more than ready to join in. I promise I'll get even more real than I already have. We haven't talked about how death walks through all of 'this thing of ours' the way a cat winds its way down back allies. It rubs up against the leg of anyone it finds within their walls and purrs with contentment. [it doesn't have to be that way, and again that is society's fault... but that's for another post]

If we all want to sit in a circle and get a little buzz talking about our drug of choice: Hey Man, I'm down with that too. I'll call it that though.

So while you all decide I've got my works, errr, I mean keyboard all fired up.

[sorry if I offend... I mean that... I truly do... its just that I'll call out hypocrisy where I see it... in myself or anyone else... I promise if anyone sees any from me they can call me on it... if you prove to me I am doing that I'll actually thank you for it.]
 
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