Dear Alyssa AKA The Ask Desi Lov Advice Column

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seeker6591

banned
#1
#1
We have another first in the NP4P forum. Desilov has agreed to become the hostess for this thread which is intended to follow the format of the original syndicated advice columns ....Dear Abbey and Ask Ann Landers. So, its quite simple, members are encouraged to ask desilove any questions they want regarding interactions and relationships between men and women....and she will respond accordingly.

Ladies and gentleman are encouraged to partipate.

Discussion and commentary is also welcome..however, since she has volunteered here, we must ask everyone to refrain from making any rude or derogatory remarks and NO FLAMING WILL BE TOLERATED.

Let the games begin !!
 
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seeker6591

banned
#2
#2
1st question

Dear Alyssa,

Why do some civilian females seem to get annoyed when they think you might be discreetly looking at their tits ?? What does a guy do if he is "busted".


seeker6591
stuck on the planet Mars
 
D

desilove

#4
#4
seeker6591 said:
Dear Alyssa,

Why do some civilian females seem to get annoyed when they think you might be discreetly looking at their tits ?? What does a guy do if he is "busted".


seeker6591
stuck on the planet Mars
Click to expand...
Depending on the situation you have multi options of handling yourself...if the female in question seems offended when she busts you, lightly and carefully brush something off the closest modest area by the "boobs" in question and simply say she had lint, string ect or even a bug (most women are freaked by bugs and will be grateful and forget the offense in question)...if she still seems offended then protect your "jewels" at all costs and come up w/ one hell of a compliment to take her focus off the offense in question. I personally think women spend so much damn time focusing on whats proper ect that they forget that we hv been blessed w/ some highly usable assets and if a man is so taken w/ the boobs that he cant keep his eyes off them, take as the flattery it is...dont be offended be proud...most woman use there assets to gain favor in many situations ie that police stop for speeding, or talking on your cell ect..how many of us hv unbutttoned that button or lowered our zipper and crossed our fingers it is a male cop pulling us over..we cant pick and choose when its ok to flaunt what God gave us and garner the attention..BUT guys be smart and try to keep the focus on the eyes if the woman in question is talking about something she deems important, because in this case it is rude and foul play when you are ignoring the convo and oggling the boobies...xox
 
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marcinny

#5
#5
I assume this is about a social situation.

Because in the situation below, who cares:
I am in the subway and I gett off in the next stop. There is no chance I will ever meet the busty babe in front of me.
So, I am going to look her right on the boobs, as an OTC good peek is all I am going to get from her anyway. Whether she considers it as a compliment or as a perverted act, I cannot care less.
 
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desilove

#6
#6
marcinny said:
I assume this is about a social situation.

Because in the situation below, who cares:
I am in the subway and I gett off in the next stop. There is no chance I will ever meet the busty babe in front of me.
So, I am going to look her right on the boobs, as an OTC good peek is all I am going to get from her anyway. Whether she considers it as a compliment or as a perverted act, I cannot care less.
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Im with you..in a very casual walking down the street/subway situation who gives a "f"..well as long as your not out and out staring and making her feel uncomf, an innocent look is just that and again she should be flattered and keep it moving...xox
 
S

seeker6591

banned
#7
#7
if you got it...flaunt it ??

Dear Desi Love,

My part time g/f, who is busty and hot looking , has always tried to conceal her boobs by wearing smaller bras, buttoning up and wearing loose fitting blouses. Recently, when we are out in public, she goes braless and wears more revealing blouses with a tighter fit. Needless to say, she is creating quite a stir in some places and is getting quite a bit of attention. Should i be concerned about all this or should i simply "go with flow" in this situation and take comfort in the fact that it is simply harmless fun and may just reinforce the male ego ??


Signed,

Clueless In Connecticut
 
D

desilove

#8
#8
seeker6591 said:
Dear Desi Love,

My part time g/f, who is busty and hot looking , has always tried to conceal her boobs by wearing smaller bras, buttoning up and wearing loose fitting blouses. Recently, when we are out in public, she goes braless and wears more revealing blouses with a tighter fit. Needless to say, she is creating quite a stir in some places and is getting quite a bit of attention. Should i be concerned about all this or should i simply "go with flow" in this situation and take comfort in the fact that it is simply harmless fun and may just reinforce the male ego ??


Signed,

Clueless In Connecticut
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Dear Clueless in Ct,

did it ever occur to you that it might not only be the male ego being reinforced? Im sure all the flattering attention also increases her ego as well. As long as it doesnt bother you or cause issue in the relationship, i say enjoy the view and hv fun...you can also get off on the fact that all those admiring glances she is getting are from men who only get to look, where as you get to take that gorgeous rack (and the lady its attached to) home with you and do a hell of a lot more then just look...xox
 
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biohazard

Moderator
#9
#9
not a good idea!

desilove said:
most woman use there assets to gain favor in many situations ie that police stop for speeding, or talking on your cell ect..how many of us hv unbutttoned that button or lowered our zipper and crossed our fingers it is a male cop pulling us over..
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last time i did that the cop beat the hell out of me and left me for dead on the side of the road, i don't know i did the same exact thing. He kept yelling that he does go that way!
 
D

desilove

#10
#10
biohazard said:
last time i did that the cop beat the hell out of me and left me for dead on the side of the road, i don't know i did the same exact thing. He kept yelling that he does go that way!
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you are my fave meatball...i was enjoying an iced coffee in star bucks when i read this and spit my coffee out from laughing so hard...im sorry guys but sadly i havent heard this method working for the male gender...xox
 
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DaveNJ

#13
#13
This pretty much explains it.

http://www.stuffmagazine.com/articles/index.aspx?id=919

http://www.wingwomen.com/

Funny though, cause I discovered the technique on my own several years ago. Going out with a hot girl to a bar or club is a great way to meet girls. And in a lot of ways its better than going out with other guys, because the girls don't cockblock. Its funny that they have agencies that let you hire a girl for that purpose though. Didn't know that before tonight.
 
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seeker6591

banned
#14
#14
Dear Alyssa,

When we are having oral, one of my fuck buddys insists that I wear a condom while she is receiving bare back oral.

Is this really fair? How should a guy handle this ??


Signed,

Screwed In Sands Point
 
D

desilove

#15
#15
DaveNJ said:
This pretty much explains it.

http://www.stuffmagazine.com/articles/index.aspx?id=919

http://www.wingwomen.com/

Funny though, cause I discovered the technique on my own several years ago. Going out with a hot girl to a bar or club is a great way to meet girls. And in a lot of ways its better than going out with other guys, because the girls don't cockblock. Its funny that they have agencies that let you hire a girl for that purpose though. Didn't know that before tonight.
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I love it! Last year I had a guy who hired me a few times to escort him to a club in the city for these exact purposes..i never knew there was a specif name for it though...so i guess i do, do that...it is true that it works, kind of fun getting hired to help a guy hook-up w/ other women....thanks for the 411...xox
 
D

desilove

#16
#16
seeker6591 said:
Dear Alyssa,

When we are having oral, one of my fuck buddys insists that I wear a condom while she is receiving bare back oral.

Is this really fair? How should a guy handle this ??


Signed,

Screwed In Sands Point
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Dear Screwed In Sands Point,

With all do respect, stop whining..you yourself say "one of my fuck buddys"...this really isnt about what is FAIR for you, this is about what is comf for this woman....if she was your GF or wife it would be a diff story but shes i just a fuck friend and this is what makes her comf...this is a casual sexual relationship...why should she do something to make you happy that might not make her happy..if its that big of a deal, dont go down on her anymore...weigh the pros and cons of the relationship, see if it s worth tolerating this one inconvenience in favor of enjoying the other pleasures you enjoy with her..if it is something that really irks you, ask her about it..see what her answer is and go from there...in any kind of relationship, communication is key...not to shrivel up the little guy but do you know her STD status? perhaps she is doing it for more then just her own safety...there is really no right answer for your question, other then this is how she feels comf enjoying oral pleasure for her own reasons...so either do it her way, or add to your fuck buddy roster and find a woman who lets you partake without restriction...it is an activity that is for her pleasure so shouldnt she be able to do it in a way that is enjoyable for her?
 
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seeker6591

banned
#17
#17
desilove said:
Dear Screwed In Sands Point,

With all do respect, stop whining..you yourself say "one of my fuck buddys"...this really isnt about what is FAIR for you, this is about what is comf for this woman....if she was your GF or wife it would be a diff story but shes i just a fuck friend and this is what makes her comf...this is a casual sexual relationship...why should she do something to make you happy that might not make her happy..if its that big of a deal, dont go down on her anymore...weigh the pros and cons of the relationship, see if it s worth tolerating this one inconvenience in favor of enjoying the other pleasures you enjoy with her..if it is something that really irks you, ask her about it..see what her answer is and go from there...in any kind of relationship, communication is key...not to shrivel up the little guy but do you know her STD status? perhaps she is doing it for more then just her own safety...there is really no right answer for your question, other then this is how she feels comf enjoying oral pleasure for her own reasons...so either do it her way, or add to your fuck buddy roster and find a woman who lets you partake without restriction...it is an activity that is for her pleasure so shouldnt she be able to do it in a way that is enjoyable for her?
Click to expand...


Dear Alyssa,

Thanks for that great reply. The only thing I was confused about was.....isn't this type of liason really about MUTUAL pleasure???


Still Screwed In Sands Point
 
D

desilove

#18
#18
seeker6591 said:
Dear Alyssa,

Thanks for that great reply. The only thing I was confused about was.....isn't this type of liason really about MUTUAL pleasure???


Still Screwed In Sands Point
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Dear Still Screwed In Sands Point,

It is without a doubt about both of your pleasure..however unfortunately it seems that receiving oral this way is what is comf for her...if she relented and did things the way YOU wanted it wouldnt be a MUTUAL anything...again i emphasis that if it is a problem for you, that you discuss this w/ her...i am curious though, does she perform BB oral on you or does she use a cover for that as well....xox
 
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desilove

#20
#20
seeker6591 said:
covered BJ's
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Ouch, that sucks...the best thing i could tell you is to open up the lines of communication and talk to her....be sensitive and listen to her reasons ect without putting to much emphasis on your needs....if her she is unwilling to change her stance on the subject, respect her enough to understand her feelings and then YOU have to decide if you want to continue the "relationship" as is or if it is to much to deal w/ and move on to the next fuck buddy...xox
 
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