Caught in the act

[Parkridge23]

A few weeks ago I had the itch to go see a provider a normal thing for me every few weeks or so. Set up a meet as per usual only I had been a little more careful in more recent months because my s/o had suspicions I was cheating on her so I was trying to plan everything so it would be quick and easy to play off if I had gotten caught. (I try and go while I’m on my way somewhere to make it look less suspicious). So I went to the hotel did the deed and when I was leaving my s/o was blowing up my phone non stop. I got to my car and started making my way to work as to not raise suspicion in case I was being tracked (another fear of mine)

So as I start heading to work I pick up the phone to start talking to her and her first words were calm and almost comforting she said “I know what you’re doing and who you’re doing it with” instant denial kicks in until she told me she’s seen texts and phone calls on my phone bill that she researched and saw who I was with. Immediately I panic thinking that our relationship is done and now people are going to find out what kind of providers I see regularly.

Up to this point not a single person in my life has any clue of this hobby of mine I’ve kept this secret to myself for years in fear of what people might say about me or how they’d act different knowing I do what I do. And to my complete surprise my S/O has NO intention of leaving me and after some long conversations she completely understands AND SUPPORTS my hobby and even has been curious herself about being with a trans woman I couldn’t believe it I still can’t. The fact that I never ever thought someone would accept me for what I do and who I do it with was a weight I carried for years. But now I feel as if I have a brand new lease in life and also have a partner in crime to do it with! Sorry for the lengthy post but it’s been a crazy few weeks

 

[Sophia Belle]

A few weeks ago I had the itch to go see a provider a normal thing for me every few weeks or so. Set up a meet as per usual only I had been a little more careful in more recent months because my s/o had suspicions I was cheating on her so I was trying to plan everything so it would be quick and easy to play off if I had gotten caught. (I try and go while I’m on my way somewhere to make it look less suspicious). So I went to the hotel did the deed and when I was leaving my s/o was blowing up my phone non stop. I got to my car and started making my way to work as to not raise suspicion in case I was being tracked (another fear of mine)

So as I start heading to work I pick up the phone to start talking to her and her first words were calm and almost comforting she said “I know what you’re doing and who you’re doing it with” instant denial kicks in until she told me she’s seen texts and phone calls on my phone bill that she researched and saw who I was with. Immediately I panic thinking that our relationship is done and now people are going to find out what kind of providers I see regularly.

Up to this point not a single person in my life has any clue of this hobby of mine I’ve kept this secret to myself for years in fear of what people might say about me or how they’d act different knowing I do what I do. And to my complete surprise my S/O has NO intention of leaving me and after some long conversations she completely understands AND SUPPORTS my hobby and even has been curious herself about being with a trans woman I couldn’t believe it I still can’t. The fact that I never ever thought someone would accept me for what I do and who I do it with was a weight I carried for years. But now I feel as if I have a brand new lease in life and also have a partner in crime to do it with! Sorry for the lengthy post but it’s been a crazy few weeks

That’s so awesome. To me, that’s love… when you really love someone, their happiness is paramount. Love is not about control, it’s about a mutual respect and understanding of one another… and it’s accompanied by a desire to be the happiness your SO is seeking.

 

[Parkridge23]

That’s so awesome. To me, that’s love… when you really love someone, their happiness is paramount. Love is not about control, it’s about a mutual respect and understanding of one another… and it’s accompanied by a desire to be the happiness your SO is seeking.

She’s great she always has been but never would I have thought she’d be ok with this she was a little upset that I was technically cheating but understands the reason why and she had even said well I can’t offer what they’re giving you due to lack of parts. So I mean the fact that’ll she’ll let me keep doing it is mind blowing to me

 

[genius]

I had a SO once ( that I lived with for several years long time ago during the 80's) who said to me that she had no problem with me seeing hookers providing I was careful with protection.

She said what she would have a problem with was me having affairs as that was cheating (fair enough — and I didn't).

I saw an article once in newspaper about swinging and we had a discussion about that and she said she would be open to that. We joined a swingers club in Plainview for a couple of years.

 

[OSMonger]

A few weeks ago I had the itch to go see a provider a normal thing for me every few weeks or so. Set up a meet as per usual only I had been a little more careful in more recent months because my s/o had suspicions I was cheating on her so I was trying to plan everything so it would be quick and easy to play off if I had gotten caught. (I try and go while I’m on my way somewhere to make it look less suspicious). So I went to the hotel did the deed and when I was leaving my s/o was blowing up my phone non stop. I got to my car and started making my way to work as to not raise suspicion in case I was being tracked (another fear of mine)

So as I start heading to work I pick up the phone to start talking to her and her first words were calm and almost comforting she said “I know what you’re doing and who you’re doing it with” instant denial kicks in until she told me she’s seen texts and phone calls on my phone bill that she researched and saw who I was with. Immediately I panic thinking that our relationship is done and now people are going to find out what kind of providers I see regularly.

Up to this point not a single person in my life has any clue of this hobby of mine I’ve kept this secret to myself for years in fear of what people might say about me or how they’d act different knowing I do what I do. And to my complete surprise my S/O has NO intention of leaving me and after some long conversations she completely understands AND SUPPORTS my hobby and even has been curious herself about being with a trans woman I couldn’t believe it I still can’t. The fact that I never ever thought someone would accept me for what I do and who I do it with was a weight I carried for years. But now I feel as if I have a brand new lease in life and also have a partner in crime to do it with! Sorry for the lengthy post but it’s been a crazy few weeks

To live an unauthentic life is a burden for most of us. The fear, the panic, the worry. Go live the best life you can and be the REAL you. Couldn’t be happier to read this post today and wish you the best.

 

[LISteve]

What kind of phone bill lists your texts and phone calls? My phone bill (Verizon) doesn't.

 

[genius]

What kind of phone bill lists your texts and phone calls? My phone bill (Verizon) doesn't.

@LISteve said "she's seen texts and phone calls on my phone bill", he probably was referring to the listing of phone #'s texted and called and not the contents of those texts and phone calls.

I recall a while back needing to get a phone # that I called and I had lost; I could get all #'s called for a long past particular bill (Verizon wireless) although I had to go online for it.

A Word To The Wise: for those of you guys who use Bluetooth in your vehicle, when I was driving somewhere with my SO, I needed to make a call. When I touched my car's screen to get to the phone app (no fingerprint login required with a phone linked with Bluetooth), up came a list of recents that were on my phone and now clearly visible to my SO.

So she got a good look at the #'s ( and attached names) for local pizza place, SO, car service place, dentist, etc.

Another reason to always use a burner (and if you are really paranoid) that you dispose of periodically.

 

[MrJizz]

Also be careful who you venmo money too. Sometimes there's a quirk in the system that you can see the venmo transactions of ppl in your contact list, along with comments

 

[billyS]

Also be careful who you venmo money too. Sometimes there's a quirk in the system that you can see the venmo transactions of ppl in your contact list, along with comments

It's not a quirk it's an option.

 

[fastpace]

Re the Bluetooth and car. If you use a text / calling app, the calls you make on the app will appear on the call list in the car. You have to delete the calls from your phone BEFORE it links to the car so they won’t appear. I usually delete the app and reload it on my phone when needed.

 

[MrJizz]

It's not a quirk it's an option.

Who selects the option? I only know because I was out having coffee and a stranger sitting across from me started laughing loudly. When he saw I was looking at him odd, he explained: he was sending money to his business partner, but when he opened his venmo account, he saw the transactions for everyone in his phone's contact list that happened to have a venmo account. He showed me his phone and he scrolled down and there were probably 50 transactions along wirh comments, including from his son's friend to his son thanking him for the "good product." I can understand the son's account, but everyone else? Golfing buddies, etc.

 

[gold69]

What kind of phone bill lists your texts and phone calls? My phone bill (Verizon) doesn't.

Thats why the burner bat phone comes in handy lol.

 

[Sophia Belle]

What kind of phone bill lists your texts and phone calls? My phone bill (Verizon) doesn't.

pretty much all of them… you can go online and look at the complete history of your calls and texts. It doesn’t reveal the content of the texts, just the phone number associated with it

 

[Sophia Belle]

Who selects the option? I only know because I was out having coffee and a stranger sitting across from me started laughing loudly. When he saw I was looking at him odd, he explained: he was sending money to his business partner, but when he opened his venmo account, he saw the transactions for everyone in his phone's contact list that happened to have a venmo account. He showed me his phone and he scrolled down and there were probably 50 transactions along wirh comments, including from his son's friend to his son thanking him for the "good product." I can understand the son's account, but everyone else? Golfing buddies, etc.

You have to go to “settings”, “privacy”, and then make the default as “private”

 

[mugi]

I had a SO once ( that I lived with for several years long time ago during the 80's) who said to me that she had no problem with me seeing hookers providing I was careful with protection.

She said what she would have a problem with was me having affairs as that was cheating (fair enough — and I didn't).

I saw an article once in newspaper about swinging and we had a discussion about that and she said she would be open to that. We joined a swingers club in Plainview for a couple of years.

Good point.

My SO knows that I must be active on the outside, because we don't have sex. But, we both act like I am a monk. And, it must be kept that way. I act like I wouldn't dare do such a thing. And, that discreetness somehow shows respect, that I respect her, because she no longer wants sex, but I show her love in every other possible way. She knows that the biological process in me might have to be expressed in some way, but she divorced herself from that aspect of my life years ago.

She comes from a culture that a wife performs sex mostly to satisfy a husband's needs. And, although a woman might find it pleasurable at times: children, family, home, education, food, clothing, cars, investments, money, reputation, friends, singing, dancing and happiness are far more important.

I also can allow my sex drive to remain dormant for a pretty good duration when family matters need my intense focus to rectify and require my physical presence to be anchored to the home. I spring into action with the outside world only when the family and home are absolutely satisfied. I need a very clear head when performing mongering, or it loses meaning and satisfation. It is not merely a release, but a concentrated ritual that must be done with precision, lest it be rendered useless.

And, for her, in her culture, growing up, whores are something that every husband sneaks away and does very discreetly, but it is deeply submerged and never flaunted. Like using the toilet, you do it and it needs to be done, but you never discuss anything about it. Why would you?

I stay away from girlfriends. A relationship was starting and it was nice but I had to kill it. We really matched well, especially sexually; really my type. I could see it obliterating most of the whores. A fun woman who was starved sex in her marriage and is ready to explode but very wary of men but finds a kindred spirit in me. Hard to resist.

But, even if I could get away with it, that split devotion between wife and girlfriend is exhausting, mentally and emotionally grueling. So, that girl believes that I found another girl, but constantly calls me to see what went wrong. If my SO found that I had a girlfriend, that would break her heart. If I break her heart, I don't think that I could bear the backdraft of that. Especially because she is generous enough to throw in the whores as a freebie. IMHO, that would just be intolerable greed on my part.

My SO is like "Marge Simpson," a housewife by trade, an incessant cleaner, non-stop, never ending. In the middle of watching TV, she will spring up and start vacuuming, sewing this or that, cleaning the remote control with alcohol, dusting, cleans my car, inside and out, rearranges, buys organizers of every imaginable type. Constantly, out with the old; in with the new.

So, I left my knapsack at home by mistake with my wallet and condoms in my wallet, secret compartments with monger rolls of cash both in the wallet and in the knapsack. I knew that it was trouble for me because when she sees a knapsack, that will have to be ripped apart apart, cleaned, dried, mended and rearranged before I return home.

She got to it, cleaned it inside and out, saw the different wads of 100's, combined them, rearranged my condoms, made my dinner, gave me a hug AND NEVER SAID A WORD!!!

An angry boyfriend/husband called my house because he found my number amidst his girl's belongings (back in the days before cell phones) and believed that I was doing her. My SO told him that that was an impossiblity because her husband is "IMPOTENT." The guy never called back.

 

[billyS]

Who selects the option? I only know because I was out having coffee and a stranger sitting across from me started laughing loudly. When he saw I was looking at him odd, he explained: he was sending money to his business partner, but when he opened his venmo account, he saw the transactions for everyone in his phone's contact list that happened to have a venmo account. He showed me his phone and he scrolled down and there were probably 50 transactions along wirh comments, including from his son's friend to his son thanking him for the "good product." I can understand the son's account, but everyone else? Golfing buddies, etc.

I think it's the default. I block mine but see anyone in my contact list who doesn't have it blocked. I think it gets it from Facebook.

 

[Monty_monty]

I also plan my activities to coincide with "errands" that are hard to track the time (wasting an extra half hour or hour) is easily hidden. Though thanks to the the LIRR, and frequent issues or the sorry, I can tell the SO I'm running late or I missed my train, meanwhile I am on my "normal" train. This often gives me at least an extra half hour if not more, that I can set up meets while on the 90 minute train ride.

I use gmail, google voice, facebook and twitter accounts connected to it my google voice account, created and connected to a throw away Yahoo account. I use all these in in incognito mode, as well as UtopiaGuide and my "escort" mongering search activities.

Also all activity is cash only, this prevents multiple problems. Cash-app scams, stolen identity (even a reputable hotel could have its data stolen, and having to explain to the SO where/when/what caused the breech) or an accidental reveal of IRL banking accounts or name.

Of course I do the big no-no for password security that I use short/simple passwords - but worst case someone can hijack my alias accounts (no connection back to my real life) so someone could impersonate me to meet escorts.

I know its getting harder to create gmail accounts that don't link back to a real life account, "for security purposes" but the extra work to create this prevents any tracing back to a real life "protected" account and anonymity is extremely important in this hobby.

 

[genius]

pretty much all of them… you can go online and look at the complete history of your calls and texts. It doesn’t reveal the content of the texts, just the phone number associated with it

Yup. I have Verizon and I can go online to my account (and everyone else's that I control) pick a month and get to see all the call and text #'s, dates, duration, etc.
I can also do it with my land line.

I don't know if I can do it with my burner as I never had a need for that yet — and my burner is only turned on for brief periods when I need to make or receive call/text. My burner is never linked to Bluetooth.

 

[Parkridge23]

Thats why the burner bat phone comes in handy lol.

I always meant to get a burner and I never did stupid on my part but I really can’t complain now the weight that came off my shoulder from her finding out and accepting my lifestyle is unbelievable. And for others asking I have version and as stated in a few comments you can see the numbers you’ve texted or called so all she did was google a few of them when she was suspicious of me a few nights found the providers profiles through a few websites and figured out what I was doing. She had known for at least 2 months before even mentioning it to me because she didn’t want to upset me by knowing that I’m in to trans women. It’s a sore subject as most of the people who see these providers already know so I appreciate her in every way I can imagine

 

[Stinky9]

No way! I’ve watched this movie and I know the ending. I’ve Called this at least a half dozen times. If a SO doesn’t exit upon getting caught cheating it’s because they know the best case scenario. Wait for retirement or when the income is at peak. Nobody wants to hear someone is serving it up better than them. BUT THATS MY 2 CENTS! Good luck buddy!

Oh and you’re banging trannys! Excuse me judge can I have a ruling sir?