Dont look too hard, some may not like what they see

#21
when I offered some money, she promised me that last day, she was going to get herself into a rehab facility(with bf) and didnt hide the fact she had a substance abuse problem.
Im only telling what I experienced, we arent talking about my problems or anyone elses.
I have too many to list.
 
#22
and so the women continue to enter and exit my life.(mostly escorts)
One I remember so well, a real looker. Perhaps not model type, but a 19y/o adorable hispanic female with a big rear end and a set of boobs to match.
I don't recall having so much fun with an agency escort since the days of that petit hispanic junkie I met years and years earlier.
The difference was this one was a clean, non drug abuser.
When she left the agency, as so many of the young ones do, I was lucky enough to have someone put me in contact with her.
It was quite a ride for me, a young vibrant 19y/0 female, really into anything, sexually, I thought I'd be with this one forever, or at least till she had enough.
Well, as usual, I thought wrong.
She didnt live in the same state as me.
She began her career in the sex industry, as a cage dancer in a strip club.
She didnt do lap dances, only danced in a cage as more of a live picture, than anything else.
She held 2 other jobs as well, working in a non descript job in an insurance firm, and working one night a week as a hostess in a food establishment.
With 3 jobs, she couldnt meet her financial obligations each month, especially since she strapped herself down with a brand new car.
She decided, since she was a very family oriented woman, to escort in another state where there was never a chance of her being spotted or noticed.
It worked out ok for a while.

then as alot of them do, she became greedy.
she expected me to spend alot more on her, even though she already cost a small fortune, much more than I"ve spent on other escorts or extended time female companions
she expected me to just say yes, instead, I questioned her as to why in the middle of the game shes changing the rules(ofcourse she didnt have to answer me, she was young, healthy and sexy, she could have told me anything she wanted, she was the boss, but I'd try my best to convince her otherwise)
She was upset, and hung up and for a week, I received nothing from her.
then she got smart, and decided to just screw me out of a little money.
I sent her the necessary money to get to NY, as usual, as I did in the past, and I never heard from her again. Well, I did, after I left her 6 vms telling her what she did isnt right, but she returned one vm, and left me the nastiest vm I've ever heard. Words that I never heard before. Threats, promises of bodily harm, and an entire 4 minute vm of death and other bad things, so instead of dealing with it, I did what most people in my situation do, wrote it off as a loss, and found another female willing to match her talent.
 
#23
and so the women continue to enter and exit my life.(mostly escorts)
One I remember so well, a real looker. Perhaps not model type, but a 19y/o adorable hispanic female with a big rear end and a set of boobs to match.
I don't recall having so much fun with an agency escort since the days of that petit hispanic junkie I met years and years earlier.
The difference was this one was a clean, non drug abuser.
When she left the agency, as so many of the young ones do, I was lucky enough to have someone put me in contact with her.
It was quite a ride for me, a young vibrant 19y/0 female, really into anything, sexually, I thought I'd be with this one forever, or at least till she had enough.
Well, as usual, I thought wrong.
She didnt live in the same state as me.
She began her career in the sex industry, as a cage dancer in a strip club.
She didnt do lap dances, only danced in a cage as more of a live picture, than anything else.
She held 2 other jobs as well, working in a non descript job in an insurance firm, and working one night a week as a hostess in a food establishment.
With 3 jobs, she couldnt meet her financial obligations each month, especially since she strapped herself down with a brand new car.
She decided, since she was a very family oriented woman, to escort in another state where there was never a chance of her being spotted or noticed.
It worked out ok for a while.

then as alot of them do, she became greedy.
she expected me to spend alot more on her, even though she already cost a small fortune, much more than I"ve spent on other escorts or extended time female companions
she expected me to just say yes, instead, I questioned her as to why in the middle of the game shes changing the rules(ofcourse she didnt have to answer me, she was young, healthy and sexy, she could have told me anything she wanted, she was the boss, but I'd try my best to convince her otherwise)
She was upset, and hung up and for a week, I received nothing from her.
then she got smart, and decided to just screw me out of a little money.
I sent her the necessary money to get to NY, as usual, as I did in the past, and I never heard from her again. Well, I did, after I left her 6 vms telling her what she did isnt right, but she returned one vm, and left me the nastiest vm I've ever heard. Words that I never heard before. Threats, promises of bodily harm, and an entire 4 minute vm of death and other bad things, so instead of dealing with it, I did what most people in my situation do, wrote it off as a loss, and found another female willing to match her talent.
 
#24
I lost you a bit on that Mr. Thorn.
Sorry. I was being too flowering and that can get ones meaning lost. I was being so because what I was trying to say was a bit biting. I thought to be relevant, not to be mean, and that is why I said it.

The title of the thread suggests its thrust is to "tell it like it is", and I was suggesting its doing a bit of that but a lot of beginning to sound like we are rehashing sex themes.

Something folks like us do quite a bit. Just this time under a banner of being "therapeutic" or "keeping it real", instead of lustful ["Not that there is anything wrong with that...}, said in my best Seinfeld].
 
#25
The majority of women, whether they come to this from lower financial bases or middle-class ones, do so out of some form of desperation.

While I agree with this statement mostly. What percentage of women love what they do and figure if men are willing to compensate them for their time, thats the whipped cream and cherry ontop of the cake. Now I know we may not be their first choice in companionships but lots of us engage in this for various reasons. Non commitement, ease of arrangement etc. And we are not necessarily so repulsive that maybe with a little work could land them. I know of a couple of women who are very grounded, have a head on their shoulders and have very good real estate investments. They enjoy a great life and work on their own terms. One of these women doesn't always expect compensation and many times tells me its not necessary. I have known her for maybe 20 25 years and we have a great situation.
Thorn, or anyone else who wishes to add, what percentage of women do you think have a huge drive for companionship and picks and chooses who she is interested in spending time with and figures...hell if I can gain financially...why not?
 
#26
In my experience, Id guesstimate 10% of the women in this profession are as you say, grounded, well balanced, and desperation plays no part.

One misconception I had, and I learned quickly,is that being a longtime monger, Ive always believed the more desperate a woman, the easier it would be to chop down walls and prices.(after all, we all want the best sex available for the cheapest price)
Not so, and Ive learned after being dumped by quite a few.
In my experience, (so noone jumps down my throat and claims Im wrong), this is only my experience, I find these truly desperate types, that decide prostitution is the only solution, have usually been fucked over by so many men, used and abused, that even though they can handle selling themselves, they arent one bit happy or glad to oblige anyone beyond what they think they have to do. Ill leave it at that.
Ive found the college type, like the one I described here, usually happy, willing to push her limits as long as it didnt hurt her, and shed profit from it.
 
#27
Its like a marriage. Starts off all hot and heavy with the sex, theres so much happiness, then as the reality of life sinks in, the bills, the every day daily routine, over and over again, people seek out new ways to be happy again, to find some excitement. Divorce is a typical way, but for me personally, , I only want the sex part with a young woman. I want it to continue yearly, and thats a very selfish attitude, but I think most men or women that frequent other sex partners besides their spouses, are just selfish people, regardless of how they claim to be in sexless marriages. Noone guaranteed a life of great sex when they decided to be with that one person.
Its all about the kindling of new excitement, finding new ways to feel good again, and if sex makes a person feel good, well, self medication, I guess, but simply just some happiness.(but agree with your post all the way)
A good % of the mongers here (myself included) are not necessarily doing this for the sex, but the adrenaline rush. There is no way to reproduce it within a marraige unless you engage in swinging. And yes it may be selfish, but with a good job, good family, and decent life, there still is a void at times and yes it does furfill it. Could I quit? Probably, but not easy to do after 20 years of it. And I know the quality of life would suffer, sad but true.

The women that I played with in the AMP circle, seem to have a hard time with it. They want the faster money, but seems to eat at them. But few seem to be able to quit on their own, because they do not want work long hours in nail saloons/restaurants. They knowly made their deal with the devil. I have offered to help them with real jobs. Not one was seriously interested.
 
#28
What percentage of women love what they do and figure if men are willing to compensate them for their time, thats the whipped cream and cherry ontop of the cake.
I think "love" is too strong a word in most cases considering what we are talking about.

While I believe that there may be more now then, say, twenty years ago due to changes in social custom and attitudes toward casual sex, I don't think it anywhere near approaches 1:10 I've seen speculated here.

I also don't believe that those that like what they do, or tolerate it well, do so all the time. I think most providers fluctuate in their feelings on the subject.

The personality quirks required: 1) a strong desire for physical intimacy with little desire for emotional contact [nymphomania at the extreme end of that spectrum]; 2) an ability to disconnect the act of sex from the ego, experiencing it only physically, are very rare.

It also has to be someone who has a very strong desire to buck the system. To run contrary to social custom and norms.

That is why I think lesbians frequently make the best providers. Devoid of any nympho-maniacal component, sex with men to them is simply a physical act. It has little or no emotional component. Since they are gay they may have already adjusted to being outside social customs and norms. What's one more going to hurt? It literally is "just a job", so they are free to think of it in professional terms.

So when a lesbian decides to work with males as a provider she may very well be in a place, mentally, where it is easier to adapt and maintain a healthy mental outlook.

Its just a theory of mine, as I don't believe any studies have ever been done on the subject.

The true nymphomaniac probably doesn't involve themselves in prostitution. They want to pick and choose just like anyone else and wouldn't necessarily see sex as a business. The incredibly rare one that does involve themselves as a provider are likely to also have other psycho-social disorders that wouldn't make them the best candidates to choose as a client to have sex with. The sex might be great, but I don't think I'd want to be around after, and I certainly wouldn't want for them to know how to find me.
 
#29
A good % of the mongers here (myself included) are not necessarily doing this for the sex, but the adrenaline rush. There is no way to reproduce it within a marraige unless you engage in swinging.
As a former swinger who fell out of the lifestyle because I fell in love [and still am deeply in love] with someone who didn't play those kind of games, but found I couldn't totally adapt to a life without "the strange" [I was wrong, what can I say], that I know precisely what you mean.

I am, even though I am slowing down a bit in my middle-age, very much an adrenaline junkie. Much of my livelihood revolved around riskier than average undertakings with a high "rush" factor. I have no doubt that, as much as I like sex, that this is in part about its "taboo" social nature and the steps required to keep a double life a secret.
 
#30
Its like a marriage. Starts off all hot and heavy with the sex, theres so much happiness, then as the reality of life sinks in, the bills, the every day daily routine, over and over again, people seek out new ways to be happy again, to find some excitement. Divorce is a typical way, but for me personally, , I only want the sex part with a young woman. I want it to continue yearly, and thats a very selfish attitude, but I think most men or women that frequent other sex partners besides their spouses, are just selfish people, regardless of how they claim to be in sexless marriages. Noone guaranteed a life of great sex when they decided to be with that one person.
Its all about the kindling of new excitement, finding new ways to feel good again, and if sex makes a person feel good, well, self medication, I guess, but simply just some happiness.(but agree with your post all the way)
A good % of the mongers here (myself included) are not necessarily doing this for the sex, but the adrenaline rush. There is no way to reproduce it within a marraige unless you engage in swinging. And yes it may be selfish, but with a good job, good family, and decent life, there still is a void at times and yes it does furfill it. Could I quit? Probably, but not easy to do after 20 years of it. And I know the quality of life would suffer, sad but true.

The women that I played with in the AMP circle, seem to have a hard time with it. They want the faster money, but seems to eat at them. But few seem to be able to quit on their own, because they do not want work long hours in nail saloons/restaurants. They knowly made their deal with the devil. I have offered to help them with real jobs. Not one was seriously interested.
 
#31
Its like a marriage. Starts off all hot and heavy with the sex, theres so much happiness, then as the reality of life sinks in, the bills, the every day daily routine, over and over again, people seek out new ways to be happy again, to find some excitement. Divorce is a typical way, but for me personally, , I only want the sex part with a young woman. I want it to continue yearly, and thats a very selfish attitude, but I think most men or women that frequent other sex partners besides their spouses, are just selfish people, regardless of how they claim to be in sexless marriages. Noone guaranteed a life of great sex when they decided to be with that one person.
Its all about the kindling of new excitement, finding new ways to feel good again, and if sex makes a person feel good, well, self medication, I guess, but simply just some happiness.(but agree with your post all the way)
A good % of the mongers here (myself included) are not necessarily doing this for the sex, but the adrenaline rush. There is no way to reproduce it within a marraige unless you engage in swinging. And yes it may be selfish, but with a good job, good family, and decent life, there still is a void at times and yes it does furfill it. Could I quit? Probably, but not easy to do after 20 years of it. And I know the quality of life would suffer, sad but true.

The women that I played with in the AMP circle, seem to have a hard time with it. They want the faster money, but seems to eat at them. But few seem to be able to quit on their own, because they do not want work long hours in nail saloons/restaurants. They knowly made their deal with the devil. I have offered to help them with real jobs. Not one was seriously interested.
 
#32
This is an interesting thread, to be sure. I especially agree with Thorn's comments about the adrenilin (sp) rush and the sense of adventure that goes with "mongering." The good thing is that our participation is strictly voluntary, and unless one has sex addiction problems, it is easy to stop. There are times when I don't look at UG, Eros, or any of the other sites. I can ignore *****s sent to me or phone calls from the ladies. Also, when I am on one of my lengthy business trips overseas, it is easy to take a break from the ladies.

I'm still not sure what I am looking for after years in the pursuit but I know that if I have a very good experience with a lady, that I will want to come back for more (BK is a good example - who wouldn't want to see her again and again!). Same goes for Emily and Jillian - I especially appreciate their contributions to UG. Now if there was only some way to meet Masquerade (other than at her low mileage sc!).

Enjoy,

Chels
 
#33
Thorn's observations about leading a double life are also spot on. I continue to have a problem with that - so it probably is a good thing in that it keeps me from spending more time and money on mongering!

Thorn's observations are always worth reading. He is the MAN! (along with JL and Wanderer).

Enjoy,

Chels
 
#35
holiday season, and things heat up.
Sugarbaby:Hey Jerry, whut u been up two lately?
Me:ah, nada, just hanging
SB:ya wanna hang out
me:when, you mean like hook up again?
SB:yeah, baby,
Me: what happenned to the other guy
SB:nah, I only saw hijm once, he wasnt my type
Me: Im youre type?
SB: yeah, no, I mean ya know I get along with you good, I wasnt happy with him
Me: I can do the same rates as before
SB: yeah, things are bad all over I guess
Me: No, thats not it, its just that I found someone Im not giving up on to see you
SB: so youre gonna see two of us
Me: No, shes a whore
SB:eek:h, ok, call me soon.
 
#36
Thorn, long time no see :)

You say you don't have any blinders on, but I submit that you still do.

Think for a moment about how fucked up normal life is. How MARRIAGE as an institution is even nastier and leads to much of the same shit or worse. The world as a WHOLE is full of people with their heads not put on straight, and I think society itself, and maybe even civilization itself is at the root of it.

NYPD statistics say that 27% of all homicides in the five boroughs are due to domestic disputes. Especially as a women, monogamous relationships can often be more dangerous than p4p!!!

As for people being abused as children, at least 1/4 of the population as a whole have gone through it, maybe more. I suspect it may be even as much as 1/2 of us really, people just don't talk about that shit openly, even on internet forums :p

I could run down a list of ordinary everyday things we all do (or almost all of us) that are absolutely TOXIC and yet we do them anyway.

And I actually believe being a good whore is something extremely special, even SPIRITUAL. To be sure, it's psychologically difficult to be indiscriminate in who gets intimate with you, it's very hard on the ego, but the annihilation of the ego is something many spiritually-minded persons and groups of people have strived for over the aeons.

I would submit that sex workers and their customers are among the people on Earth who are enlightened enough to know that something is rotten in the state of Denmark, and feel they need to step out of the mainstream.

And lastly, my current gf is a sex worker and she is the ONLY girl I have ever been with, including my ex, who has NOT been sexually abused as a child. And none of them were pros, with only one other exception.
 
#37
I'd argue that it is, for many on both sides of the equation, as much about self-medication as self-satisfaction.

The problem with self-medication is that it almost as often as not runs away from the person doing it. They don't intend it to be the cause of a new problem. Quite the contrary they hope it to be the cure, or at least temporary easement, of another problem.

As I suggested, that isn't how it works out most of the time though, is it?
Gospel truth, Thorn. Medication for what? Loneliness, depression, stress, frustration. Plain horniness, too, of course, but usually something more. Those who don't have an outlet for their sexual wants other than paying for it have to eat shit for their self-esteem and resent their "pushers" - the women - who never seem to give what the man really wants.

What's crazy about all of it is that, even knowing all this, (and thanks, Jerry) is that if I had the bucks I'd get into a sugar daddy situation if I could. How stupid am I? But I'm not alone.
 
#38
Gospel truth, Thorn. Medication for what? Loneliness, depression, stress, frustration. Plain horniness, too, of course, but usually something more. Those who don't have an outlet for their sexual wants other than paying for it have to eat shit for their self-esteem and resent their "pushers" - the women - who never seem to give what the man really wants.

What's crazy about all of it is that, even knowing all this, (and thanks, Jerry) is that if I had the bucks I'd get into a sugar daddy situation if I could. How stupid am I? But I'm not alone.
Ditto.

Although I don't resent my favorite pushers yet, in numbers terms, the majority of women I've seen through this activity really didn't interest me at all. It was an enticing photo and my hope of something worthwhile.

Thankfully (?) I find a good one now and then and those I see every chance I get.
 
#39
Thorn, long time no see :)

...

And I actually believe being a good whore is something extremely special, even SPIRITUAL. To be sure, it's psychologically difficult to be indiscriminate in who gets intimate with you, it's very hard on the ego, but the annihilation of the ego is something many spiritually-minded persons and groups of people have strived for over the aeons.

I would submit that sex workers and their customers are among the people on Earth who are enlightened enough to know that something is rotten in the state of Denmark, and feel they need to step out of the mainstream.
...
Wow, how did I miss this? I've come around to a similar point of view. If anything, the feelings I have during play with my favorite are so strong, and so long-lasting (I have real trouble staying out of life), that it's almost certainly destroying the 'relationship' (with her).

edit: I'm trying to find others so that I can give my fav some space; hopefully it isn't too late to salvage what I used to have.
 
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