You know you're screwed if...

[Stashu2]

You're undressed and waiting to be receiving services and a fully dressed guy with a badge hanging from his neck on a lanyard comes out of the bathroom.

Either way...you're fucked!

 

[beerbelly]

You're eating her out and you find a piece of food in her snatch. You say "I think I'm gonna puke".
She says, "that's what the last guy said!"

 

[Banacek]

You're eating her out and you find a piece of food in her snatch. You say "I think I'm gonna puke".
She says, "that's what the last guy said!"

Either you have a stranger imagination than myself or that actually happened to you. In any case, you have my sympathy.

 

[beerbelly]

Either you have a stranger imagination than myself or that actually happened to you. In any case, you have my sympathy.

It's from an old joke...

 

[Aiden Wilson]

Ok in a moment of clarity I saw your point B. Thanks. No all the information I got was through email,number, and texting, photo, so I'm guessing I can only yell at myself for being an idiot.

 

[Banacek]

Ok in a moment of clarity I saw your point B. Thanks. No all the information I got was through email,number, and texting, photo, so I'm guessing I can only yell at myself for being an idiot.

Seeing as this looks to be your first post, I have no idea what you are talking about. That said, we do appreciate your joining up on UG and hope that you will enjoy your time here.

 

[Aiden Wilson]

Thank you!

 

[thezoos]

You ask to use the bathroom and find her MOM is chillin in the restroom.

Yeah, that happened.

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

When you arrange a meeting and you have to do the pickup if she walks toward the car with the hood up on her sweatshirt on a beautiful day..RUN!!!

 

[K@47]

You paid $500 to bang a semi high end provider and after much effort ............you don't cum......... even when you try finishing yourself off..... Yes this totally happened.

 

[Li631]

You go to call a provider at 5am in Brooklyn and it turns out to be the girl that used to live in the neighborhood and lived in your basement apartment for 6 months.... I wanted it then and couldn't pull the trigger now If only I was aware when she was living downstairs going to college rent would have been cheaper

 

[Banacek]

You go to call a provider at 5am in Brooklyn and it turns out to be the girl that used to live in the neighborhood and lived in your basement apartment for 6 months.... I wanted it then and couldn't pull the trigger now If only I was aware when she was living downstairs going to college rent would have been cheaper

Couldn't or wouldn't?

 

[Li631]

Couldn't or wouldn't?

Not sure which way to answer that
Remembering her as a tenant is one memory
Long gone friend of my oldest brings up a whole new set of morals to me.

 

[Banacek]

Your last line explains it better. Definitely a wouldn't.

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

You drive to the ass end of the Jackie Robinson, end up by the bus depot in Bushwick, and the bitch is a no show.
Names Kristen at least her CL ad said that. No number till after email, sorry.

 

[TheRicker]

That's a hell of drive. I'm from that area. Was that take out or dine in? There is a little motel just past the MTA depot.

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

Was supposed to be a car date at her "spot". she wanted 175 for a half hour and I had to get the room.
Hot pics but when I tried chatting her up in the hope of maybe getting a little more mileage her response was" I'm not here to talk you're a phony. Hell I've made 3500 in three days.
Well let's see...3500 at 100 a blowjob equals ?????
Peroxide anyone?

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

Amanda from bayshore advertises every day on CL. Line is usually something like "single green eyed white girl"
Met once, decent bbj, allowed DFK, decided to fuck, was not bad as in yes I came.
Since then, 4 dates, 4 times left with sick in hand. Every excuse in the book. Mom needed phone, son in hospital, son died twice, sister died once, blah blah.
Don't waste time unless you say I can meet NOWWWWWW.

 

[Mr. Wiggley]

Cute white girl green eyes - w4m (East meadow) hide this posting
body: curvy
height: 5'4" (162cm)
status: single

age: 22

This is the ad for Amanda mentioned below.

 

[iwantagoodhj247]

Cute white girl green eyes - w4m (East meadow) hide this posting
body: curvy
height: 5'4" (162cm)
status: single

age: 22

This is the ad for Amanda mentioned below.

Hey Mr. Wig... I've been trying to hook up with this broad for a little over a week. She's flaked every time. Come at 11pm, motel in E.M., nice and close, text at 1030, we still on? Yup. Great. Head up there, no answer rest of the night. Said her phone died... really. She said she BB everything. And everything is on the menu, but car dates only.
Seemed too good to be true. Glad to hear you scored her.