Caretakers
There are some people like myself that are caretakers(personally and professionally) and try to help or fix people,, even though the very people they are trying to help don't want to be helped, assisted, fixed or saved. It is just something inside them and no matter what we do or try,we feel we have failed. Just for myself I am am much better at helping another than helping or caring for myself. There are a lot of broken and damaged people who are content the way they are. unfortunately the older we get the harder it seems tochange, yet one can always start over & begin from the top and learn from their prior mistakes.
I too have been a caretaker in my other profession since 84 and it is tough trying to help someone who does not want to help themselves . As well as a domestic violence advocate and victim .I am an Intuitive Empath . Intuitive Empaths have been labeled as overly sensitive , if a friend is distraught or in physical pain, I start feeling it , I get drained in crowds, going out of my way to avoid them, I get anxious in packed elevators, airplanes & subways , I am hypersensitive to noise, scents and excessie talking , when I see gruesome newscasts my energy is plummet and I get burned out by groups and require lots of time to revive .
Postive energy is where this all begins . I do not feel that "broken" or "damaged" people cannot be fixed if they want to and are understood by other caring people .
True ...the older we get the harder it seems to change . But we have to remember with age comes wisdom and to me having wisdom means everything .
In this industry it has taught me so so much about MEN and LIFE ... Sometimes to the point I wonder if I too am "broken" . I do not "hate" men .... I just understand them more now than ever .. That is why I remain SINGLE .
It is lonely growing old alone but I know way too much about how easy it is to slip away and get a little on the side and i guess you could say ... I know all the tricks of the trade ..therefore I am always on subconsicous guard when civie men approach me .
In the back of my mind I am wondering if he would not like me if he knew my other profession , or if HE has seen a provider(s) or will he cheat . Is it possible to find a "john" as a mate ? I do not know . It depends on the limits and lifestyle we want . I highly doubt it but in this day and time .... anything is possible . I have a good friend who had a wife and family and they had an open marriage where he liked to watch her get her happy on with other men and he often video taped it and he did not participate .. He was happy to see her happy and she took advantage of that and now he is alone ... She is now with one of the guys she enjoyed playing with . Needless to say my friend is lonely and says he will NEVER have another open relationship again ...his lesson learned .. When you share your wife or SO you take many chances of losing her to another who is better in bed etc....
The word "hate" is a powerful word and should be used lightly . I honestly do not feel slinkys friend or Anna N. meant that they really really hated men or that they ALL SUCK .
I feel they were hurt . All jokes aside and if the truth be known ...they were hating themselves more than anything at the time ..
Time is the best healer of all .
