Tinder...? Anyone getting action here

[mrwarpo]

The dating apps are weird locally on LI.
All of them while the same thing all have different vibes. Hinge seems to be the best of the bunch right now overall.

There also seem to be the same categories of women on them.

1) hot single mother with a child under 3 often a newborn
2) middle of the road single mother with multiple children under 10, sometimes from multiple baby daddies
3) working professional women in her mid 30s-early 40s all of a sudden wants a child
4) working professional women in 30s-40s who wants no children ever
5) fat women
6) girls who live for photos, the gram and status and don't realize they just come across like a dime a dozen cookie cutter woman with nothing to them
7) post divorce women looking to just fuck (rare but there)
8) younger girls with older man fantasies (rare but there)
9) college girls but looking for guys own age
10) post 50 yr olds looking for their 2nd or 3rd marriage, a travel companion, looking to fuck.

Many of them are very delusional and a lot of them you can see why they are still single and riding around the cock carousel of these apps.

I have been hitting Tinder hard - get a really low response rate.

CMB (coffee meets bagel) - got a few dates but no chance of action
and the women were kind of weird.

Match- useless

POF (plenty of fish) - a lot of chats but no dates

Badoo - tried it - you might have more success if you can speak Spanish

AdultFriendFinder- a few nibbles but always seem to chicken out when I offer
to get a hotel

Bumble - has to be the worst possible site invented but I still go on it.
Maybe I should try BDSM after all its got to be better than Bumble.
I think I would probably enjoy ball crushing more than Bumble.

SecretBenefits (SB) - despite all the grief I get from the site it has been steady
and have had the most success.

 

[MrJizz]

I think we forget that the majority of these sites are actually meant for dating, not fucking. Lol. Tinder may have had a reputation when it first came out (so did Match believe it or not) it's very generic nowadays. I get a few real dates that eventually turn to sex, but not onenighters, and even those are rare. If I were 20 years younger I'd like to think I'd do well, but now all I get are not so good-looking divorcees looking to replace their ex, or good looking divorcees looking to replace their ex's bank account.

 

[mrwarpo]

Totally agree.

For me - as a divorced older single guy that doesn't rock 6 pack abs
but not quite a total neck beard - I am really looking to have my cake and eat it too.

In the long term - a compatible relationship is the goal- both sex drive
wise and lifestyle wise- but those women are a needle in a haystack.

Not that it is a shock but 2-300 hundred bucks for PPM on SB and some
conversation and negotiation can work magic in the short term.
If not lifestyle at least the sex drive can be checked off.

The main problem is that long term PPM on SB is not really sustainable but lately
there always seem to be fresh options if you can be a bit flexible with
setup and location.

 

[nwo4life]

I find that the responses/matches on tinder are usually fakes who want you to join their only fans

 

[mrwarpo]

I posted in the Sugar Baby (SA / SB) thread about it.

Scams and fakes are everywhere- no matter which site - both pay to play
and the dating sites.

Be careful about any information you put in your profile, try not to share
pictures with other sites like Facebook/Instagram, assume you are talking to a scammer
by default, and get aggressive with cross checking everything.

Image search their profile pictures- a common scam is re-using Facebook
and Instagram pictures.

The second any discussion about Crypto comes up - block and report.

If they want to talk on Whatsapp - politely decline.

And for SA/SB never ever ever send them money before meeting.
Try to save your self some grief and don't use any electronic payments with them ever.

There are real people out there you just have to go thru a lot of garbage to find them.

 

[MiSoHoney]

I have had success circa 200-2013 with the dating apps, back then I would do match, OKC, and POF, not as many people were doing it or
it was still considered a little tabboo, but I would put in a little work like an hour a day at least and get a ton of dates, some days like 3 a day on a weekd, coffee, coffee, wine, etc...Maybe like 100 days in 18 months or something like that...It didn't take much effort....

No 10 years later, its almost impossible to get any real dates... the apps are saturated, the main reason being I think less women are going on there, or are leaving the apps, so the ratios are out of whack...there is anywhere from 3-5x more women on the dating apps, I think tinder is 5x1, and some hookups apps like adultfriendfinder or ashley madison, or feeld probably more like 20 x 1, add on top all the social media delusion, that create unrealistic expectations no matter its impossible for most guys to have any success for them.

 

[mrwarpo]

Totally agree.

Actually met my ex online years ago on a niche dating site. I don't think that
would happen today.

The social media sites just make it that much worse. On top of the bots/scammers
and the horrible ratios the women that are left are borderline delusional.

I'll just queue up my private jet and get that case of DOM prepped for that date
and make sure to stop at some instagram-mable locations for your feed.

 

[Super Simp]

I have met like 20 diff girls on POF between like 10 and 15yrs ago. I was using it when you had to actually go on your computer to use it.

I met my ex- Fiance on POF.

My boy met his 29yr old wife on Match. Like 6yrs ago.

I haven't used any of them recently tho.

 

[mrwarpo]

I started on POF, Coffee meets Bagel, Match, Bumble and Tinder when I first got divorced last year.

I got some weird dates on CMB and should have chased a pro from Tinder.

Was totally getting nowhere.

Signed up for Secret Benefits (SB) - knowing it was pay to play- but since traditional
sites were going nowhere I figured I had nothing to lose.

And I did some napkin math for my time wasted chasing flakes on the sites
it was worth a couple hundred bucks to just pay it upfront.

2 mid/longer term relationships- both I ended because the women had legal problems!

Prob met 3-4 that I still see on/off as NSA.

Still chasing some new leads.

I just went back to the "legitimate" dating sites again and I can see why I gave them up.
I must have reported at least 10 scammers to Tinder in the last week by simple
reverse image search.

What I like about SB is that I am able to meet a lot of different women and get out
of my comfort zone.

The whole pay to play and general age difference still bothers me but it is what it is.

 

[stevesmithny]

I created profiles on Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and CoffeeMeetsBagel. I had not received many matches previously and decided to get some headshots taken by a photographer. The updated photos and having a female friend assist in writing the bios have helped my match rate. I also went to a speed dating event in the city as well. One of the women I met at speed dating mentioned that many of the younger women in the city either date older men for money or are outright escorts and to be careful. I noticed that at least 3 of my matches from Bumble also had profiles on Seeking, so she definitely had a point. I've gotten a decent amount of dates from Hinge and some from Bumble. Tinder dates have been best for going straight for a hook-up, though I don't get as many matches on Tinder.

 

[mrwarpo]

I have had more than one match on a sugar baby site also have a full on escort posting -
it isn't hard to match them as they often re-use the photos and even some of the wording.

The other giveaways - at least for the SB sites is when they start with some ridiculously high
PPM rate and change cities a lot in their profile.

I have thought of working my profile on the dating sites but I don't think it will help.

I usually end up with SB types in their 20's or older jaded divorcees in their 40-50s looking
for someone to retire with- and I am a ways away from that!

 

[stevesmithny]

I have had more than one match on a sugar baby site also have a full on escort posting -
it isn't hard to match them as they often re-use the photos and even some of the wording.

The other giveaways - at least for the SB sites is when they start with some ridiculously high
PPM rate and change cities a lot in their profile.

I have thought of working my profile on the dating sites but I don't think it will help.

I usually end up with SB types in their 20's or older jaded divorcees in their 40-50s looking
for someone to retire with- and I am a ways away from that!

I'm in my early 40's and I think the professional headshots helped the most. I searched Craigslist for photographers and picked one that had good photos posted on their Instagram there is also snappr shoots that let's you book a photographer online. I will also say that I've seen women from Seeking that I didn't match with on Bumble and Tinder so I think it might be somewhat common for younger women living in Manhattan or the bougie parts of Brooklyn.

 

[mrwarpo]

You are probably right about the headshots.

Most women in their late 30s/40s are looking at a guy as an investment opportunity.

If not all women. I think I have yet to find any women that is not a gold digger at one
level or another.

So if the guy doesn't make some kind of effort to look professional then he is probably
not worth investing the time to contact him.

It is almost like one of those things that you know you need to do but get dragged
into it kicking and screaming.

 

[LocalNewYorkguy]

I matched with this woman who’s in a relationship with another woman. On her profile, she mentioned her girlfriend wanted to explore being with a guy, which caught my eye. After texting a bit, she suggested we meet up, just the two of us, and then potentially hang out with her girlfriend on a second date. She’s been dropping hints that she's craving time with a guy, giving off more of a hook-up vibe. I originally matched thinking it was her girlfriend looking to meet a guy, but I’m starting to think she’s actually the one craving a man. I plan on meeting her for a drink this weekend. Online dating in NYC is wild.

 

[stevesmithny]

Just received a message on Seeking from a girl from Boston. I matched with her on Hinge and Facebook dating before and she never responded to my messages. She dialed her age back 6 years to 29 years old. Not sure if I should try messaging her again on Seeking or the dating app. She created her SA profile 3 days ago and is using her real name on SA. Presents herself quite differently on SA vs Hinge. She's looking for someone to take care of her and provide a luxury lifestyle. I think she's going to be in for a rude awakening on SA.

 

[mrwarpo]

I think SA/SB oversells the girls on the potential for meeting a real sugar daddy
that is going to dump endless amounts of cash on them and some how
magically solve all their problems.

The reality is that a long term relationship on these sites is fairly rare and
they are up against AMPS, escorts, classified ads, etc etc.

It really is a race to the bottom for PPM.

 

[MassyMan]

The reality is that a long term relationship on these sites is fairly rare and
they are up against AMPS, escorts, classified ads, etc etc.

They are just civilian hookers living in delusion

 

[mrwarpo]

I thought of putting this in the SA thread but this is probably
a bit closer.

I didn't think of it but finally signed up for Snapchat
about a month ago using a burner email that I have used for chasing providers.

I just accept any recommendation that Snapchat provides and refollow
accounts that follow my account.

I am not sure if it is the algorithm or just my freaky taste but I have been
getting into conversations with at least semi-pros.

I pretty much shoot down anyone looking to sell content but have at least
2-3 discussions going in places I have visited or will travel to again at
some point.

Has anyone had any success setting something up in person from Snapchat?

 

[mrwarpo]

Still working Snapchat but seeing a lot of girls using it to funnel leads in for their only fans.

Conversations usually drop off when I refuse to sign up for OF to "get to know them better"

 

[Walker. NYC Ranger]

Just received a message on Seeking from a girl from Boston. I matched with her on Hinge and Facebook dating before and she never responded to my messages. She dialed her age back 6 years to 29 years old. Not sure if I should try messaging her again on Seeking or the dating app. She created her SA profile 3 days ago and is using her real name on SA. Presents herself quite differently on SA vs Hinge. She's looking for someone to take care of her and provide a luxury lifestyle. I think she's going to be in for a rude awakening on SA.

I've noticed the same, where I'll come across a girl on Tinder/Bumble/etc and the girl won't put any effort in having a conversation but on SA, she will be very assertive. And to me what she represents herself on SA is her true self, someone who may tell her friends and families that she is looking for a nice, charming, smart guy who matches her interests, blah blah blah, but in reality she is looking to make some extra cash by opening up her legs for the lifestyle she cannot afford on her own...

I think SA/SB oversells the girls on the potential for meeting a real sugar daddy
that is going to dump endless amounts of cash on them and some how
magically solve all their problems.

The reality is that a long term relationship on these sites is fairly rare and
they are up against AMPS, escorts, classified ads, etc etc.

It really is a race to the bottom for PPM.

I basically will tell these girls that I dont pay/provide for someone to merely exist. They need to add some value into my life. A lot of them are delusional/ignorant of the competition on this site. There will always be someone just as pretty willing to offer more for less. I end it by saying "good luck and have fun in your search"... that eats at them hard as they respond back in a bitchy manner... I'm guessing the frustration is getting to them...