The Shame of Premature Ejaculation

#1
As I age into my upper 40s, I'm finding the opposite of what I expected in terms of stamina, that is, instead of being able to last as long as I'd like, I am an embarrassingly premature ejaculator, to the point that I can't be inside a woman for even a minute before exploding, helpless. I believe it's largely psychological now, but it's still very distressing and embarrassing. Even with HJs and BJs, where it would take a lot of work to get me even close to coming in the old days, I now am very quick to let go. I was recently with a new woman for the first time, one I've been seeing for a month or so, and I made the mistake of buying extra-thin Trojans. It felt all too good the moment I was inside her, and then the inevitable onrush of sensation that I simply can no longer control.

I've tried China Brush numbing cream, which actually worked (too well), but it also gave me a very uncomfortable sensation in the tip of my penis before and after that has dissuaded me from using it again.

So, any suggestions that can get me past this? Kegel exercises? Meditation? I'm desperate to control my orgasms, but at the moment they're controlling me.
 
#3
Yeah merkin I sometimes have this problem too and I think viagra/cialis, etc is the answer. They wont necessarily stop the premature ejaculating but after you cum you'll be able to go for another round again right away.
 
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#4
when you jerk off practice getting your self close to the edge then stopping. keep your dick hard for 20 to 25 minutes by staying as close to the edge as you can. You can train your cock this way. When you first penetrate a woman don't put it in all the way just start with the tip then gradually and slowly put a little more in each time. when you push your dick in all the way don't move just hold it there until you get used to the feeling. Pull out and suck on her her tits if you have to tell her you don't want to come too quickly. good luck
 
#6
Most likely your issues are mental, not physical. I've had problems with my fiancé when I had another gf. I've had trouble with this in the amp joints, then I found a provider walking distance from my house, I saw her 4 times in a 2 month span, my dick worked great with her, then she lit a cigarette in front of me, to me it's the biggest turnoff in a woman, I'm trying to stop p4p all together, but not easy.
 
#7
Want to stop and can't

Most likely your issues are mental, not physical. I've had problems with my fiancé when I had another gf. I've had trouble with this in the amp joints, then I found a provider walking distance from my house, I saw her 4 times in a 2 month span, my dick worked great with her, then she lit a cigarette in front of me, to me it's the biggest turnoff in a woman, I'm trying to stop p4p all together, but not easy.
I have been trying For years to stop p4p. I figure I could be so much better off financially if I did.
Sad thing is my SO is gorgeous and her body is ten times better than 99% of the pros.

You guys would pay 4x what you do for her...no joke especially if your into 35-40 year olds.

She is also great in bed and really enjoys it.....I just don't get why I can't freaking stop p4p...usually get riled up when I am bored on the road ....
 
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#8
As I age into my upper 40s, I'm finding the opposite of what I expected in terms of stamina, that is, instead of being able to last as long as I'd like, I am an embarrassingly premature ejaculator, to the point that I can't be inside a woman for even a minute before exploding, helpless. I believe it's largely psychological now, but it's still very distressing and embarrassing. Even with HJs and BJs, where it would take a lot of work to get me even close to coming in the old days, I now am very quick to let go. I was recently with a new woman for the first time, one I've been seeing for a month or so, and I made the mistake of buying extra-thin Trojans. It felt all too good the moment I was inside her, and then the inevitable onrush of sensation that I simply can no longer control.

I've tried China Brush numbing cream, which actually worked (too well), but it also gave me a very uncomfortable sensation in the tip of my penis before and after that has dissuaded me from using it again.

So, any suggestions that can get me past this? Kegel exercises? Meditation? I'm desperate to control my orgasms, but at the moment they're controlling me.
I"m the same way, but I just don't care. I just get into it, do my business, and what happens, happens. It's only a "shame" if you're super-concerned about what the person whose body you're using for pleasure thinks about your stamina, and I couldn't care less.
 
#9
I have been trying For years to stop p4p. I figure I could be so much better off financially if I did.
Sad thing is my SO is gorgeous and her body is ten times better than 99% of the pros.

..
Yeah really sad, we really feel for ya. :):).
We all want some strange, that is all it is.
 
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#13
I am fairly new to this and after a 45 min massage with intense "accidental" brushing of the goods, on the flip it is just about ready to pop itself. This one time, I flipped and the friction of her removing the towel was all it took. I really wish it didn't happen so quickly so I had more time to enjoy the experience. My recharge is almost immediate and sometimes, the second pop happens just as quickly. It is really annoying. The provider was so shocked it happened and was giggling. I was on Zoloft for several years and never had any issues but once I got off of it (10 years or so ago) I seemed to have developed this ultra sensitivity. It is almost to the point where I can make it happen just by visual stimuli and minimal touching right under the head (seems to really be the only sensitive part). I could most likely get off using 1 finger. I don't think there is any type of "training" that is going to help this (I am no stranger to long edging sessions but they have done nothing during the real deal). It was to the point where I debated going back on some type of AD just to get back to "normal". As a young decent looking guy it certainly makes random hookups awkward and I just stopped altogether! To those of you who have it happen so quickly is it equally as embarrassing for you? Do you think I would benefit from some type of cream or will the AMP be willing to forget the first pop (considering she didn't even really work for it) and help out with the second? How do you even bring that up?
 
#15
I am fairly new to this and after a 45 min massage with intense "accidental" brushing of the goods, on the flip it is just about ready to pop itself. This one time, I flipped and the friction of her removing the towel was all it took. I really wish it didn't happen so quickly so I had more time to enjoy the experience. My recharge is almost immediate and sometimes, the second pop happens just as quickly. It is really annoying. The provider was so shocked it happened and was giggling. I was on Zoloft for several years and never had any issues but once I got off of it (10 years or so ago) I seemed to have developed this ultra sensitivity. It is almost to the point where I can make it happen just by visual stimuli and minimal touching right under the head (seems to really be the only sensitive part). I could most likely get off using 1 finger. I don't think there is any type of "training" that is going to help this (I am no stranger to long edging sessions but they have done nothing during the real deal). It was to the point where I debated going back on some type of AD just to get back to "normal". As a young decent looking guy it certainly makes random hookups awkward and I just stopped altogether! To those of you who have it happen so quickly is it equally as embarrassing for you? Do you think I would benefit from some type of cream or will the AMP be willing to forget the first pop (considering she didn't even really work for it) and help out with the second? How do you even bring that up?
maybe she can do the first pop in the showa, then when you get on the table make sure you dont face UP! after she does the back and legs and whatnot turn over and just tell yourself over and over: i will not come till she massages my cock for 15 minutes or a half hour! lol.. just sayin.
 
#16
maybe she can do the first pop in the showa, then when you get on the table make sure you dont face UP! after she does the back and legs and whatnot turn over and just tell yourself over and over: i will not come till she massages my cock for 15 minutes or a half hour! lol.. just sayin.
I usually avoid the showers as I am a little skeeved out by them but I did have that thought as well. Perhaps I will give it a shot and see how it is. I never actually checked them out before, I just assumed it was not clean. I do like the idea about saying you have to get it all out lol.
 
#18
I am fairly new to this and after a 45 min massage with intense "accidental" brushing of the goods, on the flip it is just about ready to pop itself. This one time, I flipped and the friction of her removing the towel was all it took. I really wish it didn't happen so quickly so I had more time to enjoy the experience. My recharge is almost immediate and sometimes, the second pop happens just as quickly. It is really annoying. The provider was so shocked it happened and was giggling. I was on Zoloft for several years and never had any issues but once I got off of it (10 years or so ago) I seemed to have developed this ultra sensitivity. It is almost to the point where I can make it happen just by visual stimuli and minimal touching right under the head (seems to really be the only sensitive part). I could most likely get off using 1 finger. I don't think there is any type of "training" that is going to help this (I am no stranger to long edging sessions but they have done nothing during the real deal). It was to the point where I debated going back on some type of AD just to get back to "normal". As a young decent looking guy it certainly makes random hookups awkward and I just stopped altogether! To those of you who have it happen so quickly is it equally as embarrassing for you? Do you think I would benefit from some type of cream or will the AMP be willing to forget the first pop (considering she didn't even really work for it) and help out with the second? How do you even bring that up?
Are you a heavy porn user and/or do you masturbate very frequently?
 
#19
Are you a heavy porn user and/or do you masturbate very frequently?
I used to be more so in the past than recently, but when I did, it would almost always be long edging sessions and not quick wham bam sessions as I thought that would help but it hasn't seem to do jack. These days, it is maybe twice a week.
 
#20
I used to be more so in the past than recently, but when I did, it would almost always be long edging sessions and not quick wham bam sessions as I thought that would help but it hasn't seem to do jack. These days, it is maybe twice a week.
That doesn't sound like a lot to me, but I'm no expert. There's research on relationships between heavy porn use/masturbation and sexual dysfunction in some people - no idea how edging fits into it. You'll find plenty of info out there if you do a web search, but be careful to sort out the stuff with a scientific base from the moralistic bullshit.
 
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