Saw Shay recently. It was just unpleasant. Didn't actually give me a price so I assumed $200 for an hour. Drove an hour out east then once I got there at the hotel, had me wait in the parking lot for another hour (obvious huge red flag). If it were a 20 minute drive I just made, I would've taken my ass home immediately. Unfortunately I'd already driven so far and had my eye on her for quite awhile (was excited when she advertised using new videos).
Anyway, after finally getting a room number I knocked on the door and it opened to the same chick in the pictures but what I assume would be after more drug use. We talked for a little bit to get comfortable but the more I looked at her the more uncomfortable I became. Face acne, picking at scabs, broken toenails, and even a mention of "don't be concerned if my nose runs and its blue. I snort prescription Xanax". At this point I'd cemented in my mind that I'd be going through with this and its too late to back out now so I opted for a BBBJ. Had set down the $200 on the table and off we went. She was actually pretty good - very enthusiastic. No CIM so I let her know when I was about to finish and she gave an HJ to completion.
Afterwards, the post-clarity hit along with the guilt and I definitely acknowledged that a second shot wasn't going to happen. Not because I couldn't do it but because of what was in front of me. Shes super nice and all but just wasn't visually appealing. Got dressed and had a long drive home with plenty of rumination.