If it's not personal, why do girls take it so personally?

Slinky Bender

Slinky Bender

The All Powerful Moderator
#22
#22
I do have to say, though, that almost universally, the one's who should be giving me SFT (if we're talking about "as a business decision") DON'T. It's the one's where it absolutely doesn't matter that this happens with.
 
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sushiman

#23
#23
I think some of the ladies who have been in the business for quite some time, or are older can probalby relate to what Slinky and others (me included) go through as we get older. When I was in my 20's, multiple pops in short periods of time was not an issue. Now, while I am in my 50's, on many meds for health reasons, our bodies don't perform like they used to. Now, if I pop once in 2 hours; great! I tell this to the ladies once we start in bed. Many of the mature ladies understand that. Why? We're human, and so are they! You want to perform like your 20? Take the blue pill. The younger providers don't understand, want to perform well for you, and please you. Yes, we're paying for it, and if you make it clear when they make the comment to you about you 'popping', just explain it. I have had some great 'oralfests' with a number of providers after the first pop. For me, after round one, the attempts after that are great, without the explosion. The ladies like it too...We just go non stop until they wear me out, or I need oxygen.......

Me personally, I like the older women, as they do get it, can relate to more of the 'personal side' of a person and not concentrate on the 'business' part of the performance and session.
 
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greyfox

#24
#24
It's rewarding for most people to experience a sex partner having an orgasm with them.You can get pleasure from knowing they are satisfied by "giving them an orgasm" or it can be a narcissistic reflection on your own sex appeal by "making them come".

Many of us have our identity conflated with our occupation to some degree.I think that this is very prevalent and a very powerful phenomenon in sex workers.I don't think it's just the pragmatic view that a customer who doesn't come won't return or will give a bad review and will have potentially adverse economic impact that troubles these girls.Their ego is bruised when a man doesn't respond to them like the sex gooddesses they need to believe they are.

I read a thread on a stripper chatboard about strippers whose boyfriends were taking Prozac or other SSRI antidepressants that prevented or severely delayed ejaculation.Even knowing that there was a chemical physiologic reason for their boyfriend not reaching orgasm,most of these girls said they would breakup with their man under these conditions.Since they presumably were emtionally attached and attracted to these guys and they could fuck their brains out,they could have laid back and enjoyed the benefit of prolonged intercourse.But the inability of a man,their man,to surrender sexually was an insult their ego could not withstand.

I've found I can mitigate the damage to some degree by warning them at the beginning of a session that I may not come.One Asian girl,Molly,at Lou's HLD didn't believe me and wagered double or nothing on getting me off on a HJ.I paid her anyway after she failed and had the additional twisted pleasure of seeing her have her girlfriend massage her right forearm in the midst of the crowd in the main lounge.
 
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Sensei58

#25
#25
Wow. Absolutely wonderful thread. Thank you for addressng the issue and all of the thoughtful input that everyone has contributed. This is somethng that I have been dealing with recently (Not necessarily providers concern for me not having a 2nd pop in a session, but not being able to pop twice in a one hr. session). I am turning 51 in a few weeks, and up until a few months ago, a 2nd pop was quite routine. Lately, it is less frequent, and when it does happen, I'm exhausted (as well as the provider). Sometimes I feel guilty for making them work so hard for the second pop. When I know it isn't going to happen, I will tell them so and suggest that we just talk for a while.
 
SirF

SirF

#26
#26
I am wondering, if it's time to quit mongering once you can't 'pop' anymore. I always wondered when, if ever, I would quit, but this has given me a new perspective.
 
Mr.Vargas

Mr.Vargas

#27
#27
Slightly Different Problem

Just getting back into the scene. (I had a serious girlfriend for a while caused me to give up the mongering life while we were together)

But i am now finding that i have a hard time popping with providers. I can still do it, but it takes a better class of broad or a harder working one. Whereas, before my girlfriend i could get any cheap thrill of the street and pop in 15 minutes. With my ex, i had no problems with multiple pops, or quick ones. I dunno, i guess this means i have to readjust to mongering. Or that i am forced to stick with providers that provide G.F.E., as that is what i am used to. I guess only time will tell. In the meantime my budget will have to change to adjust for the more expensive providers that are G.F.E. or even P.S.E.
 
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puffin

#28
#28
Mr.Vargas said:
Just getting back into the scene. (I had a serious girlfriend for a while caused me to give up the mongering life while we were together)

But i am now finding that i have a hard time popping with providers. I can still do it, but it takes a better class of broad or a harder working one. Whereas, before my girlfriend i could get any cheap thrill of the street and pop in 15 minutes. With my ex, i had no problems with multiple pops, or quick ones. I dunno, i guess this means i have to readjust to mongering. Or that i am forced to stick with providers that provide G.F.E., as that is what i am used to. I guess only time will tell. In the meantime my budget will have to change to adjust for the more expensive providers that are G.F.E. or even P.S.E.
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I find that the combination of circumstances that cause me to readily trip my trigger is only knowable through trial and error, and it changes based on my mood etc.
 
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GrouchieOne

#30
#30
I have a hard time popping my first time with a provider, I am always freaked out that a cop could kick in the door. If the provider doesn't look like her pics, I also have a tough one finishing the deed. Thats why I go to the same places over and over again.
 
lioness

lioness

#32
#32
paperpusher said:
I think part of that is because you are "Slinky" and what that represents. When I have similiar problems, regardless of the repor I have with the girl, it is blames on me, like I have a condition and not them. In their minds, they have made 1000s of guys come. The price point has nothing to do with it. Some will do the best they can, but never take it personally.
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who cares if he's "slinky" ........ did it ever cross anybody's mind that there a some of us providers who like to please people.....and when we dont we certainly get discouraged ... or did it ever cross you hobbyists minds that some of us providers have a concscience in thinking that you guys are donating pretty pennies to us (for whatever) and maybe kind of in way feel that the donation wasnt deserved making some of us feel that taking the donation anyway would make us feel like greedy little gold digging bitches. lol@myself.for.saying.who cares if he's slinky ...... sorry slinky no pun intended even though you hate me ....... but i like you even when ur being a jerk :).. randigirl
 
lioness

lioness

#34
#34
puffin said:
Sex is best when it is not entirely impersonal, but business is certainly not. Therein lies the conflict.
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yeah well u certainly stand corrected from my point of view you and i'll tell you why......
i have had appts where i totally forgot why i was there . not many but it happens ...
its all on who u click with.
 
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puffin

#35
#35
lioness said:
yeah well u certainly stand corrected from my point of view you and i'll tell you why......
i have had appts where i totally forgot why i was there . not many but it happens ...
its all on who u click with.
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How is contrary to my statement? If you forgot why you were there, you would forget to remind the client to pay, thus bad for business. This has happened to me, and in fact upon reaching the sidewalk and walking half a block, I turned around, rang the bell, and squared accounts.
 
lioness

lioness

#36
#36
puffin said:
How is contrary to my statement? If you forgot why you were there, you would forget to remind the client to pay, thus bad for business. This has happened to me, and in fact upon reaching the sidewalk and walking half a block, I turned around, rang the bell, and squared accounts.
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and you know what... i can honestly say that there were 2 in the past 5 yrs that i didnt accept the donation from that i have become very very good friends with . so i guess everybody is different ... i'm not out to argue with u in no way at all...maybe you personally havent clicked with anyone like that.... i'm just voicing my opinion that not all of us providers are, lets say robots. some of us are actually cool and down to earth. ya know.... :)
 
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puffin

#37
#37
lioness said:
and you know what... i can honestly say that there were 2 in the past 5 yrs that i didnt accept the donation from that i have become very very good friends with . so i guess everybody is different ... i'm not out to argue with u in no way at all...maybe you personally havent clicked with anyone like that.... i'm just voicing my opinion that not all of us providers are, lets say robots. some of us are actually cool and down to earth. ya know.... :)
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Believe me, as a client who was involved with a very high end Ivy educated provider (a woman whom others thought of as as a long term girlfriend when we would go out bar hopping in the east village) -- and as a man who has a relative who was a provider, I have never presumed any of them to be robots. In fact many of my more recent experiences are alarmingly intimate, meeting their relatives and real life coworkers.
 
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paperpusher

#38
#38
lioness said:
who cares if he's "slinky" ........ did it ever cross anybody's mind that there a some of us providers who like to please people.....and when we dont we certainly get discouraged ... or did it ever cross you hobbyists minds that some of us providers have a concscience in thinking that you guys are donating pretty pennies to us (for whatever) and maybe kind of in way feel that the donation wasnt deserved making some of us feel that taking the donation anyway would make us feel like greedy little gold digging bitches. lol@myself.for.saying.who cares if he's slinky ...... sorry slinky no pun intended even though you hate me ....... but i like you even when ur being a jerk :).. randigirl
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Randi, two things. First of all, do you want me to address a post written over a year and half ago? I do remember our session quite vividly, only because of the conversation that was said prior to the encounter. Secondly, you did not even remotely address in what context my threads were about. Do you want me to elaborate or you can reread the thread and see what it was all about?

I would suggest just dropping it, because it isnt very important.
 
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paperpusher

#39
#39
paperpusher said:
Randi, two things. First of all, do you want me to address a post written over a year and half ago? I do remember our session quite vividly, only because of the conversation that was said prior to the encounter. Secondly, you did not even remotely address in what context my threads were about. Do you want me to elaborate or you can reread the thread and see what it was all about?

I would suggest just dropping it, because it isnt very important.
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I guess I have to wait nine months for her response. LOL
 
lioness

lioness

#40
#40
paperpusher said:
I guess I have to wait nine months for her response. LOL
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no u dont have to wait nine months and making a comment like the one u just made really shows ur inner juvenile self and i will not quiet myself for u or anybody who comes along . if i have an opinion i'll speak it . so i suggest maybe you should hush and not take it so personally . what do think just because i am a provider that i shouldn't express my opinion even it is way off base..... yeah ok thats me thats exactly what i'll do ... yeah right . did u even understand what i was trying to say? . maybe what happend a yr and 1/2 ago is a year and a half ago . so big deal. move on. stop trying to fight with me cause i'm not trying to fight with you .
 
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