Hump University

WizardOfAhhs

WizardOfAhhs

#1
#1
*******Now Hiring********

Due to a recent (and wholly unexpected, and quite frankly, unwarranted, and I never would have paid it if you people had done what 90% of the world expected you to do and not put me in this position) $25 million dollar expense, HUMP University is forced to expand its operations into new areas. In order to successfully meet our yuge sales goals (they are so big! so big), we are now hiring new staff in all positions (mish, cg, k9, your choice. Although she does charge extra for anal). Since I only ever do business with people who have shown unquestionable loyalty (and very questionable judgement), I will accept applications, nominations, and (let me repeat this) iterations from any UG member in good standing (good behavior is not required. In fact, it's probably a hindrance). So nominate today your UG member for any position you think they're best suited for. As for me, I'm outta here. I have an entire world to go fuck with now.
 
Li631

Li631

#3
#3
We must find the Mistress of Delectable Delights (perhaps a vote in the tasty twats thread)
A Masters in Mouth (both rookie and advanced)... Perhaps a Head Mistress?
Master in Massage
A Dean of Doo doo Delight (maybe a rim master... theres a layup)
A SAM counselor (now sporting the Stripey Shirt)
Anything and anything on the table.... including a Dine at the Y (Cafeteria name could just be.... Y)
 
Mr. Wiggley

Mr. Wiggley

But what do I know I'm a bad guy
#5
#5
Ladies staff

Ashley 201 is below

Mandy is tenured twat

Kelly Keegan is patriarch of the pole. Yes I know and if anyone comes up with a good M word I concede.

Sophia is in literature and runs readin, ritin, and rectums.

Sophia and Kelly KK are the charter members of the sisters of the sperm sorority.

When she gets back Victoria will be assuming the position of valedicktorian of the vagina.

If she ever ever returned SAlly can take over the vacancy as chairperson of the School of Sword Swallowing.
 
vad1

vad1

#10
#10
Banacek said:
LMFAO at "yuge."
This thread should be a wet dream for vad1.
Click to expand...
(The Chump speaks)

This 'not cool, not cool'.

I should have started this thread.

When I become a Mad Orator, I'm going to put B as AG and put WOAh in prison. WOAh, WOAh, this is going to be so yuge. (Yea, I know you said it first, you MSM are always jealous of my looks)

I am the Dean, Director, what not. I am IT. The fuck stops here.

Now Vice Dean: Dean of Vices of course, is SB (no, not Slinky!)

This is a sensitive issue, but KK? I don't know, I get mauled when there is another K. Tenured professor at Large. She is flexible, she will be on board. Yes, yes, also on the table, floor, ceiling, all gold.

Professor Emeritus is toothless Patty. I know, I know, I have a soft spot for her as she did for me.

Thanks Faux news for your coverage. I heard that everyone is talking about you, you are in Facebook, Tinder, kik, ... eh what?

Language skills are vital. I'm interviewing a few women from my folder (oh, different election, different guy, he is going to be my sucky estate man or something).

They will be seeing me at my Many Get laid O place. I will talk about this on YouLube.

Just getting started. Oh, I'm building a wall so big around campus(sy). It will be so big, so big. And the TERrible website will pay for it.

Chumpion of the asses,
(Only wubbucks need apply)

....................

V
 
WizardOfAhhs

WizardOfAhhs

#12
#12
Banacek said:
I especially like who is paying for the wall.
Funny shit, guys. Glad everyone is having a Fun Friday.
Click to expand...
Fun? FUN?!?! I finally take a day off, got about a 4-5 hour window in the AM before the SO gets home, I figure plenty of time for some local fun. But my ATF is 100 miles away blowing God knows who, my 2 morning finds turn out to be duds, and my 3rd string back up is an overpriced amp working out of an underpriced hotel. So how do I spend the day? Raking goddam leaves!!! And you have the balls to call this Fun Fucking Friday!?!
 
vad1

vad1

#13
#13
WizardOfAhhs said:
Fun? FUN?!?! I finally take a day off, got about a 4-5 hour window in the AM before the SO gets home, I figure plenty of time for some local fun. But my ATF is 100 miles away blowing God knows who, my 2 morning finds turn out to be duds, and my 3rd string back up is an overpriced amp working out of an underpriced hotel. So how do I spend the day? Raking goddam leaves!!! And you have the balls to call this Fun Fucking Friday!?!
Click to expand...
Using a leaf blower would be a different kinda blow job, it blows and is a job.

V
 
Mr. Wiggley

Mr. Wiggley

But what do I know I'm a bad guy
#14
#14
WizardOfAhhs said:
Fun? FUN?!?! I finally take a day off, got about a 4-5 hour window in the AM before the SO gets home, I figure plenty of time for some local fun. But my ATF is 100 miles away blowing God knows who, my 2 morning finds turn out to be duds, and my 3rd string back up is an overpriced amp working out of an underpriced hotel. So how do I spend the day? Raking goddam leaves!!! And you have the balls to call this Fun Fucking Friday!?!
Click to expand...
You should have used a landscaper while you had the chance they will all be out of business January 21st.
 
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