Good point.
My SO knows that I must be active on the outside, because we don't have sex. But, we both act like I am a monk. And, it must be kept that way. I act like I wouldn't dare do such a thing. And, that discreetness somehow shows respect, that I respect her, because she no longer wants sex, but I show her love in every other possible way. She knows that the biological process in me might have to be expressed in some way, but she divorced herself from that aspect of my life years ago.
She comes from a culture that a wife performs sex mostly to satisfy a husband's needs. And, although a woman might find it pleasurable at times: children, family, home, education, food, clothing, cars, investments, money, reputation, friends, singing, dancing and happiness are far more important.
I also can allow my sex drive to remain dormant for a pretty good duration when family matters need my intense focus to rectify and require my physical presence to be anchored to the home. I spring into action with the outside world only when the family and home are absolutely satisfied. I need a very clear head when performing mongering, or it loses meaning and satisfation. It is not merely a release, but a concentrated ritual that must be done with precision, lest it be rendered useless.
And, for her, in her culture, growing up, whores are something that every husband sneaks away and does very discreetly, but it is deeply submerged and never flaunted. Like using the toilet, you do it and it needs to be done, but you never discuss anything about it. Why would you?
I stay away from girlfriends. A relationship was starting and it was nice but I had to kill it. We really matched well, especially sexually; really my type. I could see it obliterating most of the whores. A fun woman who was starved sex in her marriage and is ready to explode but very wary of men but finds a kindred spirit in me. Hard to resist.
But, even if I could get away with it, that split devotion between wife and girlfriend is exhausting, mentally and emotionally grueling. So, that girl believes that I found another girl, but constantly calls me to see what went wrong. If my SO found that I had a girlfriend, that would break her heart. If I break her heart, I don't think that I could bear the backdraft of that. Especially because she is generous enough to throw in the whores as a freebie. IMHO, that would just be intolerable greed on my part.
My SO is like "Marge Simpson," a housewife by trade, an incessant cleaner, non-stop, never ending. In the middle of watching TV, she will spring up and start vacuuming, sewing this or that, cleaning the remote control with alcohol, dusting, cleans my car, inside and out, rearranges, buys organizers of every imaginable type. Constantly, out with the old; in with the new.
So, I left my knapsack at home by mistake with my wallet and condoms in my wallet, secret compartments with monger rolls of cash both in the wallet and in the knapsack. I knew that it was trouble for me because when she sees a knapsack, that will have to be ripped apart apart, cleaned, dried, mended and rearranged before I return home.
She got to it, cleaned it inside and out, saw the different wads of 100's, combined them, rearranged my condoms, made my dinner, gave me a hug AND NEVER SAID A WORD!!!
An angry boyfriend/husband called my house because he found my number amidst his girl's belongings (back in the days before cell phones) and believed that I was doing her. My SO told him that that was an impossiblity because her husband is "IMPOTENT." The guy never called back.