A Question For Providers

#1
I have a question that I've often wondered about: how are you able to compartmentalize your feelings? In other words, if you're a provider and you're married or have a SO, how do you separate your feelings for your spouse/SO from those for your clients, specifically the ones who you enjoy seeing on a regular basis? Is it just that your job is your job, but your deepest feelings for your spouse/SO remain unchanged? Do you not think about your spouse/SO when you're doing your job? Does your spouse/SO even know what your job is, and are the OK with it? I've always read about the clients and their motivations/feelings for seeing providers and some of the emotions (or lack of) involved with this activity, but I don't recall ever reading about it from the provider's point of view.

Thanks in advance!
 

Sophia Belle

Trickle Down Economist
#2
I have a question that I've often wondered about: how are you able to compartmentalize your feelings? In other words, if you're a provider and you're married or have a SO, how do you separate your feelings for your spouse/SO from those for your clients, specifically the ones who you enjoy seeing on a regular basis? Is it just that your job is your job, but your deepest feelings for your spouse/SO remain unchanged? Do you not think about your spouse/SO when you're doing your job? Does your spouse/SO even know what your job is, and are the OK with it? I've always read about the clients and their motivations/feelings for seeing providers and some of the emotions (or lack of) involved with this activity, but I don't recall ever reading about it from the provider's point of view.

Thanks in advance!

To be honest, it’s easier than you may think. I feel like the feelings I have for each person is individual and separate from the feelings I have towards another. I have learned to love from all aspects. I try to not look for “more” from any one relationship. I feel like when you are in a regular/common relationship, you look for that one person to encompass all of your hopes and dreams and fantasies. In reality, that’s not really logical. Human interaction is so important- why limit yourself to only one? It’s not really about compartmentalism, it’s more about focusing on the one you’re with at the time and the qualities you love about them. Be happy and appreciate what’s right in front of you, rather than looking for something or someone that’s not there at the moment. That’s how I see it ;)
 
#3
Thank you for the thoughtful reply!

See, I was curious about providers who are married or have an SO. I don't want to pry into your personal life, but do you know any other providers who are married or have an SO? How do the separate their private life and feelings from their professional life and feelings? How do they achieve the balance? This fascinates me because I've always been taught about how men and women fundamentally view sex. For men, it's more about "power" and for women, it's more about "nurturing", for lack of better terms. These are meant to be general terms, not insoluble rules, but a lot of feelings fall into one of the two categories.
 

Sophia Belle

Trickle Down Economist
#4
Thank you for the thoughtful reply!

See, I was curious about providers who are married or have an SO. I don't want to pry into your personal life, but do you know any other providers who are married or have an SO? How do the separate their private life and feelings from their professional life and feelings? How do they achieve the balance? This fascinates me because I've always been taught about how men and women fundamentally view sex. For men, it's more about "power" and for women, it's more about "nurturing", for lack of better terms. These are meant to be general terms, not insoluble rules, but a lot of feelings fall into one of the two categories.
I know several providers that do… including myself … There’s no “emotion”, per se, involved in the job aspect of it. Just friends with benefits. This job doesn’t interfere with your feelings for your SO because it’s a transaction… it has nothing to do with your feelings it’s about achieving the independence to take care of yourself. If the transactions stop, so does the service, ya know.

I feel like people were taught and raised to believe what you described but that’s something I feel like is another example of what is “expected” but not necessarily true for all. As providers, We realize that you come to see us for a service… and then you go home to your SO… well we provide the service and then go home to our SO… there’s fundamentally no difference as far as I can tell. Why would we waste time trying to sort through emotions that won’t be reciprocated or even considered.

“This fascinates me because I've always been taught about how men and women fundamentally view sex. For men, it's more about "power" and for women, it's more about "nurturing", for lack of better terms.”

Sex is power… the power of the Pussy is a real thing… so maybe women in our business see themselves as in charge and powerful because of what they have to offer the men who are just looking for the nurturing they aren’t receiving at home? See how easily that can be viewed from a different aspect?
 
#5
I agree Sophia. It goes both ways. Guys usually also have no emotions. They are just looking for a good time and or good sex. Something fun. Guys dont have to worry about the provider calling , texting etc, where you meet a girl in the bar, you take her out, it usually causes problems, which, I know first hand, many times over, because I don't learn my lesson. However, There are guys, that I know for a fact, ( and you, Sophia, mentioned it recently ) there are guys that calls and texts a provider, thinking they have a special relationship... But I have to think, sometime, a provider, also starts to really like a guy she sees also. Very interesting.
 
#8
Thank you for the thoughtful reply!

See, I was curious about providers who are married or have an SO. I don't want to pry into your personal life, but do you know any other providers who are married or have an SO? How do the separate their private life and feelings from their professional life and feelings? How do they achieve the balance? This fascinates me because I've always been taught about how men and women fundamentally view sex. For men, it's more about "power" and for women, it's more about "nurturing", for lack of better terms. These are meant to be general terms, not insoluble rules, but a lot of feelings fall into one of the two categories.
I feel like we all start off in this hobby with the expectations of providing or receiving a service.... through time if a client becomes a regular then it usually developes more into a friends with benefits encounter rather than a regular professional meet...

I will have to say I don't agree with being taught of male "power" and women "nurturing" analogies when it comes to sex.. I feel women have more power in our pussy because whether a provider or a civilian we women can bring a man's pants down with minimal work if he's in the right season to stray and play.....and as for women....if we used sex a nurturing then wives and SO's would nurture their husbands in bed more often so y'all aren't seeking the sexual release y'all deserve in the relationship elsewhere....but that's my personal opinion..may not be right.....

Balancing it out between professional and my personal partner is easy..... don't bring work home..and don't bring home to work.... it's said in the "regular" professions this is no different....we love our husbands and SO's the same way y'all love y'all wives and SO's the ONLY difference is our guys know what we do as opposed to the situation in the clients' personal life....but I don't feel it's hard to separate the two...
 
#9
I know several providers that do… including myself … There’s no “emotion”, per se, involved in the job aspect of it. Just friends with benefits. This job doesn’t interfere with your feelings for your SO because it’s a transaction… it has nothing to do with your feelings it’s about achieving the independence to take care of yourself. If the transactions stop, so does the service, ya know.

I feel like people were taught and raised to believe what you described but that’s something I feel like is another example of what is “expected” but not necessarily true for all. As providers, We realize that you come to see us for a service… and then you go home to your SO… well we provide the service and then go home to our SO… there’s fundamentally no difference as far as I can tell. Why would we waste time trying to sort through emotions that won’t be reciprocated or even considered.

“This fascinates me because I've always been taught about how men and women fundamentally view sex. For men, it's more about "power" and for women, it's more about "nurturing", for lack of better terms.”

Sex is power… the power of the Pussy is a real thing… so maybe women in our business see themselves as in charge and powerful because of what they have to offer the men who are just looking for the nurturing they aren’t receiving at home? See how easily that can be viewed from a different aspect?
One of the main words you used that stands out to me and what i also use to separate or keep emotions aside is "transaction". A transaction whenever i see a "sb" is what keeps me from liking her more then i should. Ive notice over the years when there is no transactions involved thats when things can and will get twisted, so makes sense that that would go for providers also.
 

billyS

Reign of Terror
#10
.. I feel women have more power in our pussy because whether a provider or a civilian we women can bring a man's pants down with minimal work if he's in the right season to stray and play..
That's true to a degree.
Yes, at a younger age the woman have the advantage over younger men whose hormones rage and think more with their dicks.

But as a woman gets older and heavier the power of her pussy diminishes.

Where as an older man with means can still attract younger woman because the past usage of his penis is less of a factor than his wallet and sexual experience, an older woman, especially if it is known she allows most of her customers to cum inside her, will become undesirable, negating the mythical power of her pussy.
 
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